I can’t deny that I am in rather a deranged state when I wake up in the middle of the night. Whether I break out in a sweat during a horrendous nightmare or stir from a sweet dream, the first thing I do when I come to is check the time on my phone. That’s normal enough I’d say. But I then proceed to consult news sites to check what Trump is up to. I look in dread but madly I read on and on, knowing I am about to drive sleep out of my weary body.

When I read the first line of garbage that spews from the White House or wherever the Donald is, I immediately thank God or whatever divine being looks after us. Thank Him that the world or some of it is still working well enough to enable me to get a signal on my phone. Gratitude that the nutter of a president hasn’t done the what-used-to-be unthinkable and hit the Armageddon button.

Then I trawl the news, move on to some analysis about Trump and his co-stars in the current Washington show. I consult the polls and thank God again that the slightly mad people of America who voted him in are now very quickly turning against him.

Then I remember that the polls had also said that he, the Donald, the nutcase, the misogynist, the clown, could never be made president. And he was elected so the joke is on us, the TV star with the funny hair and funnier brain is still president of the most potent country in the world.

But can we easily survive without Donald Trump and his earth-shattering blunders? If he goes, either having been blown off to some remote galaxy or if he is impeached, what will I do when I wake up at night?

Even our own locally-brewed politicians with their pettiness, huge arrogance and huger love of all things wrong, appear normal compared to the US president.

Who will give me fodder to realise just how normal and attractive Angela Merkel and her ilk are? Even our own locally-brewed politicians with their pettiness, huge arrogance and huger love of all things wrong, appear normal compared to the US president.

What will the real jokers, the cartoonists, the late-night comedians and all the rest of the humour brigade do?

Life might be close to the edge right now for all of us but Trumpitis—the need to know too much about the Donald—is certainly a good antidote to insomnia and boredom.

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