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Wedding vitriol

I’m really at a loss with certain people; actually, let me rephrase that, I’m really at a loss with certain women. In a time when we should be lifting each other up, where we should be drawing from each other’s histories and experiences, where we should be coming together, some of us seem really happy to be small-minded and well, downright petty. Ironically, it all started with a dress.

Quite recently, a girl with a lovely figure wore a particular dress to a wedding and posted a photo of it online. Yes, the dress was short. Yes, the dress was tight and yes, every woman and their mother appeared to have a problem with it. Of course, it was not enough for everyone to just say they didn’t like it and move on with their day: instead, we, the internet audience, were regaled with comments ranging from calling the girl an attention seeker to straight up calling her a prostitute. Even now I’m holding my head in complete and utter disgust.

I’m going to say it once and loudly for the cheap seats at the back: it is never okay to call someone a prostitute because of the way they dress. It is especially not okay to call them a prostitute simply because you don’t believe that what they are wearing is wedding appropriate. Quite a few women even went as far as accusing her of ruining the couple’s wedding and honestly, what does one even say in response? If a bad dress were enough to ruin someone’s wedding then quite frankly most weddings would be ruined. I’ve literally lost track of the number of ‘interesting’ outfits I’ve encountered at weddings but it’s hardly the be all and end all of my life and I would have had to lead a pretty pathetic existence if it were.

If a bad dress were enough to ruin someone’s wedding then quite frankly most weddings would be ruined

The girl made a further valid point on her online post: why is it that bigger women are almost always heaped with praise and lauded as being brave for their dress choices by other women and thinner women are always judged far more harshly? Is it because they feel less threatened and insecure about someone that in their own minds wouldn’t be competition?

A few of my dearest friends are models and the way they are treated by some other women is nothing short of appalling. It’s not just the open, unabashed daggered stares which have at times made me worry for their safety, but it’s the vitriolic commentary which many times goes with it.

I don’t think I’ve ever experienced such animosity between two people who have literally never even met and know nothing about one another. Before you go spouting out rubbish towards another person you don’t know, take a step back and ask yourself why you feel compelled to be so nasty. Don’t allow your own insecurities and projections to stand in the way of being the best person you can be; instead, use that energy to actually try and reach your own potential. We really should be able to do better than this.

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