This was not the best of weekends.

Saturday afternoon was great. I took part in the celebration of the sacrament of Confirmation at the parish of St Gregory in Sliema. The liturgy was very well prepared by a group of women under the guidance of the parish priest. I was there because of dear Christina Lauri. She and another 31 adolescents were confirmed by Mgr. Joe Bugeja. Christina was wonderful. I was sorry that during her dinner party I spent more time on my mobile. Developments during the final few hours of the referendum made me a lousy guest. I apologize.

Then things turned disastrous. Barca trounced Man United. I went to sleep with a sour taste. It was the harbinger of things to come. The polls had warned us of the referendum results could be close but till the last days we had contrasting interpretations of the results which I did not expect to be so bad. The 54% for the yes side was quite a surprise for me.

Dr Pullicino Orlando has the credit of proposing the bill. He took a big risk but it paid off in the end. However, the person who should be really credited for the success of the Yes vote is Dr Deborah Schembri. She is calm, credible and capable. She has stamina; loads of stamina. I could never fathom how she could keep soldering on, debate after debate, speech after speech. Her performances gave credibility to a referendum question which was not credible.

Perhaps many did not bother about the referendum question. The choice, for many was, for divorce or no divorce. This discussion happened within a cultural framework that made it very difficult for the no campaign to make the in-roads it hoped for. The issue was more of a cultural than a legal nature. The media had an important role in the Yes victory not because of their role during the formal campaign. The media were important because they, among others, along the years, pushed forward the culture wherein, for example, the common good is gauged from the perspective of the individual rather than from the perspective of the community. In more sense than one the referendum debate was a clash between two cultures which are not necessarily total enemies.

And what about the Church?

Will the Church read the result with the help of such an interpretative key? I doubt it.

During the campaign I warned that the Church was boxing itself in a lose/lose situation. The openness which was evidenced in a declaration signed by seven priests and approved by Archbishop Cremona in October 2010 was a flash in the pan and not a reflection of the state of mind existing in all level of the ecclesiastical food chain. The whispering and then loud references (veiled and less veiled) to mortal sin, the Bible brandishing during televised debates, the wrong use (not to say abuse) of sacred images and occasions were among the things that, I fear, painted the Church as an organization bent on imposition not dialogue. The Church fell into two traps: (i) this is the Sixties all over; (ii) this is a struggle for legitimate distinction between Church and state. The Church lost on both counts. This was compounded by the fact that the Church, during the campaign, made a number of strategic mistakes and kept on making them till voting day.

I fear that now there will be the temptation to blame everyone except ourselves. Now the rush will be on to find scapegoats – the media will quite naturally be portrayed as the number on enemy. (There will be a phase of negation and alienation. Consider this: this week Maltese priests will be meeting for their annual course of permanent formation. They will not be discussing the effects of this historical decision but will be studying IVF. Incredible, isn't it?) I fear that a siege mentality will set in. this will provide solace for many who do not have the capability or the desire to engage in real dialogue with contemporary culture.

This is not the Church that Archbishop Cremona is striving to build but I fear that the contrary position will prevail.

This morning, in the Sunday Times I appealed all and one to search for common ground between both camps. This is an appeal I made on previous occasions. The family and marriage should now be at the centre of all government's policy. I am happy to note that the Prime Minister made this commitment during his televised reaction to the referendum results. Spoke persons for the Yes Campaign and the Leader of the Opposition made a similar commitment.

However, the proof of the pudding will be in the eating.