A vibrant trait, which is obviously not exclusive to the character of the inhabitants of this archipelago, is the constant need to indulge in passionate discussions about various topics, which range from the Valletta regeneration project to, the trials and tribulations of Maltese Premier League football and the decades-old divorce debate. It is perhaps this last item that at this moment has the finest ability to raise up by a few notches the intensity of the discussions barometer and fill up some significant space in our newspapers and online blogs, this one being an example.
The recent divorce contestations manifested since the writing of two opposing reports on this subject, have taken on the somewhat predictable Maltese ad nauseum ‘us vs. them' approach. Accusations of misinformation, strict dogmatism, destructive liberalism, and even utter callousness are flying in all directions, thereby rendering the divorce debate a battleground of individuals rather than a constructive setting where one can calmly reason out differences.
Malta's 2009 divorce question should not be seen as just another discussion of a ‘yes or no' opinion. In this day and age it would be appropriate to examine seriously the statistics that illustrate the social fabric of Maltese society and its views on marriage and family life. Furthermore, it would be also valuable if one takes into account the real problems that are hampering family life and obliterating supposedly happy marriages into desperate ones.
This could be achieved by holding a civil discussion made up of and open to all those who are able to contribute to the well-being of today's and tomorrow's families. Membership need not be restricted to any one particular group or act as a protective boundary to the hegemony of an ideology, but it should be an invitation to everyone, be they clerics, social scientists, laypersons, politicians, and any others, to find some sort of common ground between them.
The Church and any other interested social organisations should also be encouraged to present their views and hold discussions within their own internal structure as long as they do not interfere with the workings of the secular State.
Through this varied input, Maltese society should aim to put up for discussion a whole comprehensive package that aims to strengthen the bonds between those who are planning to enter into this life-long commitment with the aim of building a family through the nurturing of an excellent relationship between them. In addition, we must urgently address the lack of parenting skills in a number of parents and problems related to communication that a number of couples face. These two can result in a considerable amount of tension that renders marriage and family life unbearable for those involved in it, particularly children.
Failed marriages are daily realities crying out for our attention and society is duty-bound to find a solution for the suffering of those involved.
Divorce should be discussed in this light, whether or not it can provide some sort of comfort to individuals who have had the misfortune of being in a relationship that is in a dead-end. As a stand-alone measure, it would not be able to address the problems that cause first marriages to fall short of the couples' expectations, just as an inexperienced driver must first learn and assimilate the skills needed to drive responsibly, before shifting the blame of his poor judgment on the state of the roads, other motorists, or the vehicle itself.
Today's context also calls on us to face once and for all the anomalous fact that foreign divorces are recognised by the Maltese legal system. The 1975 Marriage Act opened up a back door for some to obtain a divorce abroad, leaving others with perhaps less resources and acumen unable to do this.
The present and constantly evolving social realities should serve as an alarm bell for all of us, reminding us of our responsibility to start finding solutions to the rising number of failed marriages and separations. After the causes have been identified, the State must finally propose and implement measures that could alleviate the plight of these people. Divorce should be discussed as one such measure, and its pros and cons decided upon the most widely agreeable scientific and logical rationale.
The Maltese and Gozitans await a decision that deals with this subject in earnest.
Noel Camilleri is starting his 3rd year of studies leading to a BA (English) Honours degree and is the new Features editor of insiteronline.com.