Insomnia....Warning!!! Those Who Have Not Yet Grasped the Concept of The Sarcasm in My Blogs Do Not Read This!
2:00 am Insomnia, what a killer! Sometimes I wonder if I do suffer from it...or if it's just my cold that's keeping me up. I hate colds and now its the time for them! That burning sensation in your throat, the concrete blocked nose, the red soreness...... all thanks to air-conditioning. It kills me when I walk in from the hot arid air outside into Siberian-like temperatures in shops. "Can I help you with something miss?" the sales assistant will ask, to which I feel like replying "Hypothermia, thank you."
2:45 am How much Facebooking can you possibly fit into a night? First, ‘one' changes their status. ‘One' should try to make it an original funny phrase to attract more people onto ‘one's' page and possibly get them to comment. Then ‘one' writes nonsense on people's wall. Occasionally, one wishes ‘Friends' (cause on Facebook Frenemies are many! Haha) Happy birthday, even though you don't really know them that well. Finally one may upload photos and tell others that you don't really like people spying on your so-called-private life, when in actual fact you just love the fact that people spy on you, because let's face it, you spy on others yourself.....ah the beauty of Facebook!!
3:00am A thought crosses my mind. With no fear in my heart of sounding like Paris Hilton on one of her brighter days, I ponder about the thought of the one physical defect that I embrace. I know I'm partially squint! I think it's hilarious that people actually take the mickey out of me losing my eye at times. A teacher in year 1 had pointed it out to my mother and told her I should get glasses. Then a doctor said it was cause my eyes were too far apart, "Great" I thought to myself "I'm the elephant man!" (sic) Later at 6th Form this one guy kept calling me Ronaldo, I could never ever get the joke. When I asked him why, the elaborate explanation, referred to the fact that I took on football with the women's team and I would never be able to score a goal because I was squint according to him. Funny? Nah....think I should count sheep it's better.
3:20am 1, 2, 3, 4, 5....Sheep are boring, I'd rather count instruments. Did you know that philharmonic orchestras have up to 100 musicians? Incredible, how they all play in symphony creating heavenly music. Lately my grand father was watching a DVD of Andre Rieu, the Dutch Violonist, Composer and Conductor. I was awe-struck, by his talent, but moreover by how entertaining his show is.
3:45am Finished my first bog roll and get up to get another one. My nose is seriously red and sore now and I'm starting to develop a Michael Jackson ‘Nose' complex. ‘Plastic Surgery,' I've thought about it. Not in the Lolo Ferrari way, God forbid. She was a ‘tad' too much! I guess it's just Human Nature to always want to correct here and there, if there's the chance to. As yet, to make things very clear, I have had no plastic surgery. This last phrase was inserted to stop anyone from even wondering whether I've had some.
4:00am Maybe it's the heat that's keeping me up. Obviously I don't switch on my air-conditioning, for fear of getting worse. "Time to enjoy a swim" I tell myself. However after tons of emails, I'm sorting out a pool membership this year, for fear of being ‘wounded' by those hideous looking Portugese Jelly Fish.....Geez Louise they are FUGLY! And deadly apparently. So pool it is, when I do get the time to splash around and enjoy the sun, with appropriate sun screen.
4:30am Which reminds me of that song by Baz Luhrmann, "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)". I always loved that part which went "Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary...what ever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either - your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's." The bit with the funky chicken always cracked me up, the rest made me think.....
5:00am My eyes half close I look at my alarm clock, I've done it again. Went off at a tangent. Slowly my eyes close, my breathing slows down, I fall into a sleep, Did you know that dreams last only 5 to 20 minutes?....ARRRghhhh I did it again!!!!....SLEEP!!! Good night everyone!