I heard a good one a couple of days ago.
Joseph Muscat, current leader of the Labour Party, should be allowed to patent himself, which is not precisely possible from the tiny amount of law I know. He should also create and register a TradeMark. "Botox Joe" is the suggestion made, free, gratis and for nothing. This is not because he uses the stuff, being a youthful chappie who needs no assistance to look all firm and upstanding around the eyes and lips, but because he is having - or so his handlers would love to believe - that precise effect on his Party.
Think about it: the public face of the Labour Party is, in no order of ascendancy, Karmenu Vella, Alex Sceberras Trigona, Yana Bland Mintoff, Joe Debono Grech, Toni Abela, Anglu Farrugia, Michael Falzon, Joe Grima and assorted other veterans of glorious times past, such as Coleiro Preca, Charles Mangion and Leo Brincat.
In the public's eyes, however, this venerable band of brothers and sisters is rendered all fresh and sprightly by the judicious sprinkling of magic Joseph Dust. Metaphorically, we're looking at Marlene Dietrich morphing into Angelina Jolie, all smoke and mirrors.
At the same time, Muscat himself is doing his best, and his best is not at all bad in this context, to appeal to the old guard, the ones to whom his predecessor and (maybe not) mentor had sought to appeal when he poured oodles of scorn over the perfidious VAT. I'm told that he waxed lyrical, almost with tears springing from his doe-like eyes, in his defence of such members of the commercial community who have found themselves having a barney with the VAT Department.
No-one likes paying tax, or filling in forms, or anything connected with such tedious and annoying practices, but for the Man-Who-Would-Be PM to hold a candle for people who have collected tax from me and you but neglected to pass it on to the Republic's Treasury is a bit dangerous. Combining this with what he had said he would do about refunding VAT on vehicle registration costs "irrespective what the Courts say" leads me to wonder about how far Muscat will go to scoop up votes.
His next line, at this rate, will be one about how hunters will be paid a bonus for every bird they blast into Kingdom Come, and how this will be tax-free.
I exaggerate for effect, as one does, but you catch my drift, I suspect.