Last week, the Millennium Chapel held its annual ceremony to support the families of young people who died in tragic circumstances, including suicide and drug addiction.

A woman who lost her son to suicide is urging people to be less judgemental as she combats the stigma that comes with mental health issues.

Marie Louise Cilia lost her son 14 years ago. Aged 27, Stefano died by suicide.

“I felt the need to share the pain and support others who have gone through the same thing, while also trying to remove the stigma of mental health issues and suicide,” she said just before the Memory Tree of Light ceremony at the Millennium Chapel last week.

Together with the parent of another young victim and six friends, Ms Cilia had organised a similar ceremony at the chapel back in 2004.

Twelve years on, the ceremony remembered 165 youths who died in tragic circumstances, including drug abuse and traffic accidents.

It has become an annual event as part of the chapel’s anniversary. Candle in hand, relatives and friends surround a tree within the Millennium Chapel grounds that is lit with fairy lights, symbolising the bonding between the living and the departed.

Those present for the vigil this week hung up a heart-shaped ornament carrying the name of their deceased friend or relative. These will remain on the tree throughout the Christmas festivities, one of the toughest times for families who have lost a loved one.

Be more compassionate and less judgemental

Coming together is of great support for Ms Cilia, who in turn is always there for those going through difficult times. Her son had depression on and off for a number of years and had attempted suicide before.

She knows that her son felt ashamed because of his attempts and the stigma stopped him from seeking help.

While nowadays there is more help available, she appealed for more understanding from society, including from professionals.

Marie Louise Cilia is calling for more understanding of mental health issues. Photos: Chris Sant Fournier

Ms Cilia said that another motive behind the ceremony was that some surviving relatives felt they had failed their loved ones and sometimes also felt ashamed.

“Our loved ones were going through a dark moment which is beyond our comprehension. We must try to remember them in their happiest moments, and treasure them. God is merciful and is ready to embrace each one of us despite our failures.

“To the people out there, be more compassionate and less judgemental. God forbid that you have to go through our tragedy. I do not wish it even on my worst enemy,” she added, just before Fr Hilary Tagliaferro, founder of the Millennium Chapel, started the annual ceremony with Mass. Fr Tagliaferro also acknowledged the recurrent guilt feelings carried by relatives and friends, and he hoped that the ceremony’s message would be one of hope.

During the service, the congregation remembered those who lost the fight against drug abuse. Fr Tagliaferro urged those following Caritas’ drug rehabilitation programme, who were present, not to give up.

Chris Gatt, who overcame addiction seven years ago, pleaded with them to keep fighting. “I had to do the programme twice and I too found it difficult. At times it seemed impossible, but it’s not, if you give it time.

“There are times when you question why you’re following the programme, but have faith, it’s not impossible to complete.”

Mr Gatt lost his older brother Darren to a drug overdose. “I started the first programme as I had nothing left in life… but losing my brother made me realise that I had to do something so that his death would not have been in vain.”

Mr Gatt said that overcoming addiction was the most difficult thing he had done in life, and he only managed because of the support he received from his relatives, friends and Caritas. “I decided to come forward because I hope I can save at least one life. Don’t lose hope and ask for help,” he urged those battling drug addiction.