Modern times seem to suggest we should enjoy everything. With this line of thinking, businesses have brought their light brands on the market. If one likes to have a soft drink without a powerful dose of sugar, one could go for the “light” version. Family-run businesses are on the decrease. The plc is on the increase. The plc is the company with limited liabilities. If a plc goes bust, one only loses the amounts invested in this company. This trend has now reached marriage in Malta as well.
Many have nowadays forgotten that the indissoluble marriage was the symbol of progress. It meant an end to the law of the jungle where men used to “hunt” and women were only keen on making themselves attractive. Marriage as we know it put an end to the roles of the hunter and his trophy. It was conceived as a revolution born in the Egyptian and Jewish cradles. And it freed mankind to go ahead with real progress in life where sexual appeal was not the main focus of life jamming all other initiatives.
A lifelong marriage is only possible when both partners invest everything in it. The moment one of the partners starts thinking of leaving assets and spheres out of marriage life, cracks will start appearing and deepening and marriage breakdown become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Marriage plc, as the Yes movement in favour of divorce would have it, would relegate indissoluble marriage to the island’s bins of history.
The pro-divorce group would never admit it wishes a marriage “light”. It is only in favour of a new beginning for those who have suffered marriage breakdowns. So am I. I wish those who are suffering a new beginning but I fail to understand why a new beginning is only possible when the whole concept of marriage is turned upside down.
By opening the floodgates and limiting the lifespan of all the marriage bondages we would be creating a level playing field indeed, one at a very low level with the poorest of standards. Those in favour of divorce argue that nobody will be forced to terminate the existing marriage and that happy marriages will survive the environment of divorce. They forget that even happy marriages go through difficult periods. Relationships – good and bad – have to go through their rollercoaster rides too.
When talking about divorce we should not forget the young generation. Young people only need to put some pressure on their parents and they know they will get everything. They know their parents cannot afford to say no and risk being disdained by their own children. It is no wonder, therefore, that many grown-ups in their “realistic” approach think a generation of binge drinkers would not make it to a lifelong marriage and that the threshold should be lowered.
I have serious doubts whether this lowering of standards would lead to a better society and I do not agree the young generation is lost. At heart, a young person yearns for a solid marriage and holds loyalty in high esteem. Undercutting his/her spouse’s commitment through the availability of divorce makes a mockery of loyalty and a loving heart.