The trend not to register a baby’s father at birth has been on the decline recently, going back down to the levels of 10 years ago after a sharp rise in the last decade. Theology and psychology University lecturer Fr Paul Galea tells Simonne Pace the reasons for this, which include the availability and increased demand of DNA typing in Malta for the sake of claiming paternity, as well as stricter control on any abuse.

We read and hear a lot about women and single mothers who want to have ‘father unknown’ on their baby’s birth certificate. Doesn’t this issue send out the wrong message: that it’s fine for a man to have a child and not father it. What do you think? Are there many mothers who resort to this? Why do they do it?

The phenomenon of declaring the father as unknown is quite a complex one, even though it is not new to Malta. It always existed and there are studies that show that a couple of centuries ago it was a very diffuse practice, especially in the major cities around Malta and in Gozo. It was less common in the rural areas and in small villages.

What has hit the news recently was the sharp rise that has taken place in the last decade or so, with a peak around 2006/2007, where about 10 per cent of children, which is about 350 of the children born every year, registered as such. The records have since shown a decrease, going back down to the levels of 10 years ago.

Sometimes, it is the mother’s parents who enforce it to distance the father they don’t like, for example, when the father is still a minor and when they see the relationship as inappropriate

There are various reasons that can lead a mother to do so. First of all, there are cases where the father is really unknown. This could happen if the mother is promiscuous or does not remember the sexual encounter as when under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

But there are other reasons that are based more on expediency. A case could be when the father is a foreigner and there are fears that the child might be taken away from her. Sometimes, it is the mother’s parents who enforce it to distance the father they don’t like, for example, when the father is still a minor and when they see the relationship as inappropriate.

Other instances could be when the father is already married to someone else and does not want to disclose his paternity. Finally, there is the financial reason, which is very often brought forward – that of the mother taking advantage of the welfare system.

Although there are people who make such financial calculations, the outcomes are not that spectacular, in that these would still be living on the poverty line. There has been a stricter control on such abuses recently. My opinion is that the father is seldom unknown.

The trend not to register the baby’s father at birth has been going down recently. There are various reasons for this. Among these is the availability of DNA typing in Malta. Requests for DNA typing for the sake of claiming paternity have increased over the past few years. There are about 250 requests a year for this sort of testing from the laboratories in Malta.

Moreover, mothers are becoming more conscious of the effects of depriving their children of legal fatherhood and are realising that this could be a short-sighted decision. Many are becoming concerned about the future, should the child at a later stage want to know who the father is. Furthermore, one should not ignore the risk that in a small and densely populated island like ours, the risk of someone unknowingly marrying a half-brother or sister is quite high.

What can these mothers do to be able to raise the child with more involvement from the biological father?

Raising a child without a father is neither easy nor the ideal. It is plain evident that single parenting reduces considerably the opportunities for both parent and child. We all know that many single parents in today’s society, especially the mothers, constitute a sizeable portion of today’s poor and contribute to what is known as the feminisation of poverty.

Among the many opportunities missed is the active presence of a father in the family; of a male role model. From a psychological point of view, being a father has always been an uphill struggle.

The Romans used to say: Mater semper certa est – you always know who the mother is, even though that will no longer be the case in the future with in-vitro fertilisation, surrogate motherhood, etc. What is more likely is that the bond between mother and child is almost immediate at birth. With the father, it takes longer.

It is as if the father has to work for it. This is less difficult if the father is present. But it becomes a formidable task if he is not accessible. The gap created by a missing father will have to be filled by someone else. One might ask: What is more important? Attachment to a missing biological father or attachment to a ‘foster’ father with no biological ties? This is not an easy question, as both cases depart from the ideal. What we are seeing in Malta is an increasing involvement of grandparents, which is some sort of compromise and offers a noteworthy compensation.

The presence of a father and of a male role model is necessary for both sexes, even though these opinions have been strongly challenged by modern philosophical trends, which have also encroached onto the social sciences. Fierce battles have been fought in the field of anthropology, with sharp contrasts between those who would like to keep some link between kinship and biology and others who hold that “it is all in the mind”.

The reduction of the family to single units with ‘Lego’ ties giving form to a plethora of relationships has increased the plurality of models to such an extent that there is no agreement of what constitutes a family. This applies also to marriage. With the disjointing of biology from relationships through the claim that all is ‘man-made’, many forms of ‘marital’ relationships have been reconstructed.

But going back to more psychological concerns, it is important for the child to identify with, and to learn the cultural gender roles, even though these might seem less important today. Being male or female is first and foremost a biological fact.

The brain and the body are feminised or masculinised in the womb by the hormones during pregnancy. The psychological identification, a sort of alignment between the brain and the body, is a process that starts from the womb and runs into childbirth through a learning process mediated by culture, through adolescence and early adulthood.

The father’s presence is important both for the boy and for the girl. The girl will learn to consolidate her feminine identity through differentiation, as is the case with the boy in relation to his mother. This learning process has a very strong bearing later on in life when it comes to mate selection.

The other scenario is that of the mother marrying, or living with someone else who is not the biological father of the child. This situation can be very complex, especially if the child has not bonded with the mother’s partner.

The process is less difficult when the child is quite young. The father might be seen as an intruder and his authority can be stiffly challenged. In the case of a girl, there might also be problems related to boundaries as the risk of sexual abuse increases. The other phenomenon we are witnessing in Malta is when the single mother has raised her child at her parental home with the rest of her family.

For the child to leave home and live with his mother, especially with someone who is not the biological father, can be a turbulent experience. It can also be traumatic for the grandparents who have learned to live with and to parent that child.

For the other cases where the biological father is known but is absent, as is often the case with separation, there has to be a serious intent by both parents to increase contact especially the quality time in the best interest of the child. Children can be quite resilient and even in these unhappy situations, they can profit a lot if there is a minimum of stability and continuity in contacts and in relations.

Parents should learn to bracket their differences for the sake of the child. This applies mostly to mothers who usually have the custody of the child. Given that even in normal situations the father has to gain the respect of the child, one can imagine how difficult this could be where there is litigation, and worse still, when the mother works against it.

Why are there so many single mothers? Is society missing out on something?

The phenomenon of single motherhood has been on the increase everywhere in the Western world. It has been a constant finding throughout Europe that women are becoming mothers in the course of their first relationship. The massive spread of unmarried cohabitation reveals a shift in the way people start relationships.

In most European countries, as in Malta, cohabitation for many turns out to be an extended prelude to marriage, and oftentimes it includes parenthood. Cohabitation comes in various forms. What is most common in Malta is semi-cohabitation or, living apart together.

It is very important to keep in mind that being single does not necessarily mean being unpartnered. Other factors are sexual permissiveness, risk-taking among adolescents, lack of adequate sexual education and peer pressure. To this, one should add the economic difficulties, the high prices in the rental and purchase of residences and studies and career, which have pushed the age of marriage to the late 20s.

The improved welfare system combined with the loss of stigma with out-of-wedlock births has had quite a contribution in the shift in morals. On top of this is the increased individualism and search for self-fulfilment, which aims at putting oneself on top with less concern about third parties.

What is distinctive about the last decade is that these phenomena appear to have taken place massively and all at the same time.

How can these single mothers be helped? What role does the Church have in helping them?

Helping single mothers is a relative concept. The responsibility of raising children quite naturally lies on the biological parents.

Society will try to do its best to compensate as much as possible, cognisant also of the possible repercussions. One could argue that this might reinforce such practices. This is probably the case for some.

But one should also consider the contrary if one were to withhold help. Life would not only be unbearable for single mothers but it would severely increase the risks for children along with other social problems.

In Malta, we are lucky we have the welfare state. There are countries like the US where infant mortality is high for the simple reason that not everyone can afford to have access to health services. The kind of help the state offers to single mothers in Malta is quite basic.

Of course, the best help is preventive. But this is a thorny issue. It is very difficult to turn the tide. But the case in Malta is quite unique. While on the one hand we see a steady 25 per cent of children born out of wedlock every year, a rate which is comparable to that in the US, quite distinctly, the number of people marrying every year is also high and on the increase.

Marriage is still very popular in Malta. Most people still want to marry. Church weddings are a big thing. This means that most of the children born out of wedlock are finding a place in a home sooner or later.

It is the order that has been inverted, a sort of ‘pairing, parenting and promising’ or ‘putting the carriage before the marriage’.

Going back to single mothers, the contribution the Church can give can be on an institutional as well as on the local community or parish level.

On the institutional level, the Church runs several homes for children as well as shelters for mothers. About 100, out of the 160 children living in homes, belong to unmarried mothers who continue to have access to them, while their kids are fed and raised by the nuns.

This, of course, is not the ideal as it recreates the same scenario of a life without a father.

On the local parish level, there are a number of mother-and-baby clubs where single mothers blend with other mothers and benefit from the many solidarity funds. More importantly, they are included in the parish family.

What do you think could help solve this problem? More education?

More education certainly does not harm. It is in the interest of all that people exercise not only responsible sexuality but also responsible parenthood. To address the issue, there has to be a deep understanding of the cultural changes that are taking place in our society.

One should not ignore the fact that in a small and densely populated island like ours, the risk of someone unknowingly marrying a half-brother or sister is quite high

We have to acknowledge that the linear, progressive and stepwise journey to marriage does not hold for everyone. What is consoling is that many aim at reaching that goal, albeit through tortuous paths. For those taking an offroad journey, we have to thank mostly the (grand) parents who, with enormous sacrifices and personal deprivations, are helping them to settle down in life and bring them back on track. The state can also contribute not only through welfare but also through education. This is a delicate matter. It all depends on the policies of the government; whether it wants to strengthen marriage and the family, without marginalising anyone, through effective policies and family-friendly measures or go for the lobbying, which could cause further fragmentation. I think experience and common sense dictate that having more functional families is in the best interest of society.

The Church also faces a formidable task, especially when it comes to marriage preparation. Most parish priests in Malta have to face such a wide variety of situations that it goes beyond imagination. The other field where such problems surface is in the marriage preparation courses.

While, generally, such courses cater best for those couples taking a lineal, progressive route to marriage, they might be inadequate to address these new situations.

I can understand the uneasiness of many couple leaders when they discuss matters like sexuality, pre-marital cohabitation, unknown fatherhood and marriage when they know that the audience has a different mentality and has adopted a completely different lifestyle. I know that the Cana Movement is embarking on a new marriage preparation course. My opinion is that these courses have to address also these new pastoral issues.

Fr Paul Galea has a PhD in Pastoral Counselling from Loyola University in Maryland, the US, a Master’s degree in clinical psychology from the Pontifical Gregorian University in Rome and in Pastoral Theology from the University of Malta. His areas of research are in personality assessment and family studies. Some of his studies have been published in international scientific journals.