Christmas is approaching and I have struggled to decide whether I am happy or sad about it. Some spend Christmas with their family, others like to travel with their partners and others just enjoy it with friends.

Me, I have always spent Christmas with family – it has been a tradition since I can remember that, on Christmas Day, we get all our gifts, label them and put them under grandma’s Christmas tree. Each year, grandpa or an uncle dresses up as Father Christmas and we all sit around waiting for him to call our names. By the end of the present-giveaway, the room is always filled with wrapping paper and many happy smiles.

As I grew up, there were no more toys but the happy smiles always remained. Being with family and seeing everyone jolly and excited is an indescribable feeling.

The last three Christmases were far from the same. Nothing was. Each year I start the festivities with a stress headache and pre-Christmas tears. Will I be spending this Christmas with mum or with dad? Who will I be leaving alone this Christmas? Trying to please everyone is exhausting and wherever I am there is always someone missing, nothing is the same.

Something different happened this year, I heard about a person I knew who is seriously ill and I really felt selfish for feeling sad about my Christmas. Sick people will be spending Christmas in bed. Families will be spending it with a sick loved-one wondering whether this will be their last Christmas together. Starving children out on the streets will have no food and no roof over their heads.

Am I seriously complaining because I have two homes? When some have none? Sad isn’t it, how life is. For the future, I will try to be thankful – for everything that I have.