There is much more to style expert TANYA BORG CARDONA than meets the eye. Simonne Pace discovers that behind the woman who is passionate about looking and feeling good is a person who has been through a lot in life and has come out on top.
Life skills consultant Tanya Borg Cardona is a tiny woman with a big mission in life – living day by day, knowing she can make a difference in people’s lives.
I have a motto: If I look good, I feel good. And if I feel good, the world is alright
Her only son Nick’s death in 2009 of leukaemia has turned her life upside down and taught her to take things easier, to be more compassionate and to be a better human being.
Looking amazing in a pair of jeans and a lace top, Tanya sits on a beige sofa with her legs crossed under her in the impeccably decorated living room of her Sliema apartment. She has an infectious smile which grows on you instantly.
Her short, jet-black hair perfectly suits her face, which lights up as she speaks.
“You do not cope with the death of a son,” she admits. “You learn to live day by day. The pain does not get better and the separation becomes more infinite. But I never gave in, from the day before my dear Nick passed away to the day after. I have a motto: If I look good, I feel good. And if I feel good, the world is alright,” she chuckles.
A woman who doesn’t mince her words, the 57-year-old style, image and etiquette expert has finally experienced inner peace and only feels fulfilled when she can be of help to others.
The olive-skinned, petite woman, wearing a pair of high-heeled wedges, is a life skills coach and has a natural flair for style, image and etiquette. As a teenager, Tanya wished she would grow taller. She hated herself being short, especially since most of her friends were much taller.
“Until, of course, I met actress Jane Seymour, who is as tall as me and everyone fell over their feet to meet her,” she laughs confidently.
“However, if you don’t want to change, I cannot change you. You can be the best that you can be. Always try to be the best you can,” she harps on.
Tanya hails from a commercial background. Her first job was a PA to a managing director of an import company. In her mid-20s, she was already married and had her son Nick. But she always felt this wasn’t enough and wanted more out of life. Being a lively person, she decided to keep herself busy by attending courses she liked.
“I was very active and anything not in the normal realm of life attracted my attention. I learnt a lot about life skills, attended spiritual courses and enjoyed social studies immensely,” she says excitedly.
She also did a Rhodec course in interior design which, although still vague at the time, was the best in those days, and took an interest in practical philosophy. By the age of 30, Tanya had a house, a baby and a “fantastic husband”, but this wasn’t where she wanted to go.
After separating from her husband, she needed to be out and about and worked for a time with a mobile phone company.
Nick was almost two years old when Tanya’s mother got unwell and couldn’t take care of him anymore. So she decided to stop working and enjoy her time with Nick.
“My time was always very much my own, so quitting my job was a conscious decision.”
These were happy times in Tanya’s life, as she would get ready early in the morning and head for the beach with her son, her sister, with whom she is very close, and friends in tow.
“The children loved it. They were happy moments I will never forget,” she recalls.
“My sister always wanted to be the man who sold paraffin on the street. I just wanted to grow up and wear heels. If we had dolls, I would be the one doing their hair or dressing them up; my sister would be turning my pushchair into a van.”
Tanya always had a mind about the things she liked and disliked. She would organise a dinner party any time but would never dream of cooking.
“My sister, on the other hand, would open the fridge and cook up a meal for 10 people. She cooks and bakes beautifully. She can also paint and sew. I find no need to prove myself. It’s the end result that counts,” Tanya says cheekily.
My sister always wanted to be the man who sold paraffin on the street. I just wanted to grow up and wear heels
The bubbly fashionista says just one glance at a person is enough. “I would know what hairstyle, clothes and shoes to go for straight away.”
When Nick started school, Tanya found a job with a subsidiary of a Malta-based Libyan firm. In the meantime, she also attended a two-year course in diplomatic studies at the University.
Other job experiences ensued, including being appointed the financial controller of a group of telecommunications companies in 1993. “How time flies,”she reminisces.
She sat on the Housing Authority board up until last March and when she was asked to run the four-year Headstart project in 2005, implemented by the authority, Tanya couldn’t find it in her heart to say no. The project, which was part of an EU-funded programme, targeted giving children in institutes a better start in life.
“I was responsible for 16 children, who became like my own,” she explains.
“The children received training, lived in an apartment and earned a minimum wage. In turn, they had to attend all the lessons and could even do a part-time job. Being part of a team, I taught them life skills, checked what food they bought, how they used their money and how they spent it.”
As Tanya talks about life, her son’s death, pain and failed relationships, she says she believes that what you give you get. It was through the Headstart project that she met priest and counsellor Godwin Genovese, who worked with the Sisters of Mother Teresa and with children in Cambodia.
The two became good friends and Tanya still attends Fr Godwin’s spiritual courses, which mean a lot to her.
A person who loves to argue but is focused and has an excellent memory, Tanya believes we all come into this world for a specific time and reason. Talking about her son Nick’s death in 14 months, she says: “In truth, it is not about the person who dies but about the people left behind. It is mostly heartbreaking for us,” her voice quivers.
So, while on the one hand, Tanya is a lover of beauty, a woman full of life and desire to live, she now looks at life differently.
“I can now sit still and garner my thoughts. I can actually see things when they are happening, as opposed to fighting to try to make the world better.
“I know there are things I can change but I live my life trying to help people. I love to make a difference. I love to bring change. Any change is good. Even a bad decision is a good one. No decision means no change.”
Tanya Borg Cardona has her own personal blog at www.tbcstyle.com. She runs courses in image consultation, fashion styling, vocal communication and body language. She also lectures in etiquette, covering corporate training, business programmes, social coaching and youth workshops.