The ‘mother’ of Father’s Day was Sonora Louise Smart Dodd. Sonora, the daughter of Elizabeth Harris and William Smart, had witnessed her father provide and care for her siblings single-handedly in Spokane, Washington, after the death of her mother in 1878.

Does culture foster inappropriate ideas of masculinity?- Amanda Garzia

Two years down the line, however, William remarried a widow with three children. He and his new wife went on to have six children. These children, like his and Elizabeth’s children before them, became his sole responsibility in 1898 when he became a widower for the second time.

When Sonora herself was married, a sermon about Mother’s Day inspired her to suggest a similar day for fathers. The date she proposed for the occasion was her father’s birthday, June 5.

Instead, the first recorded Father’s Day took place on June 19, 1910, because it so happened that there had not been sufficient time to prepare a sermon by the 5th. According to John Ayto, Sonora’s idea was, in part, inspired by the wish that fathers “should not feel left out by Mother’s Day”.

Why is the role of fatherhood, compared to motherhood, so often sidelined? Traditional ideas about fatherhood and motherhood have undoubtedly had their bearing on the way society expects a father to act. While the mother has traditionally been associated with the home, it has also been a constant for the father to be the family’s representative outside the home in the role of breadwinner and protector.

Analysis of traditional ideas about fatherhood and motherhood has occupied the social sciences for the best part of the post-war period. These traditional ideas basically held that men are dominant over women.

As psychiatrist and educator Rudolf Dreikurs noted, this idea of male superiority shaped, in turn, the image of the ideal father. He observed that in a patriarchal society “the father represents power and right (and) for children of such a father, man is definitely endowed with force, efficiency, and strength”.

As scholars have examined the characteristics historically associated with men and women in their role as parents, it became clear that men and women are often perceived as opposites. If a man issupposed to be powerful, a woman is expected to be submissive.

Society is structured, according to this framework, in such a way that women are discouraged from wielding more power than men and boys are discouraged from adopting supposedly feminine traits.

Does culture foster inappropriate models of masculinity? If oneconsiders, for example, the basic plot of many classic texts, it is possible to realise how often the main character – the hero – is a male who, sooner or later, occupies a position of power and ventures forth in the world to rule and conquer.

Similar plot lines are popular in video games and films. Female characters are more often found on the ‘periphery’, tending to all matters domestic, particularly the skills of nurturing.

According to Marina Warner, the “culture that produces irresponsible fathers openly extols a form of masculinity that is opposed to continuity, care, negotiation, and even cunning – qualities necessary to make lasting attachments between men and children, men and women”.

Warner believes, in other words, that responsible fathers are the ones who embrace some of the traits society tends to associate with the female gender. One such trait, for example, is that of actively listening to the child instead of using what Michael Poplin describes as “communication blocks”. Blocks include being sarcastic, moralising, being a know-it-all, focusing on mistakes and expecting too much or too little of the child.

Research has shown, however, that the behaviour displayed by fathers and mothers is not necessarily as gendered as we may think it is. In an overview of the research carried out to determine the actual nature of parental behaviour, Robert Veneziano noted that scholars often began their work with two basic assumptions.

They assumed, first of all, that mothers are the emotional leaders of the family. In other words, mothers display affection and tend to the emotional needs of their children. Secondly, researchers also assumed that fathers were the instrumental leaders of the family because they are breadwinners and protectors who, compared to mothers, spend less time at home.

According to the results of several studies, however, these assumptions were shown to be reductive. It appears, in Veneziano’s words, that “maternal behaviour is not situated exclusively in the expressive sphere any more than paternal behaviour is situated in the instrumental one”. Perhaps society is sending a series of mixed messages which require somewhat of a balancing act.

In Gender: Psychological Perspectives, Linda Brannon outlines the dilemma facing the fathers of Western culture as they attempt to meets demands at home and demands at work.

It appears that demands at work are a priority even though parenting educators constantly emphasise the importance of fathers sharing in the upbringing of offspring and the management of the home.

Brannon notes that studies by Barnett and Baruch show that society expects men to devote more energy to their career than to their family because men’s jobs “are their core role, and family enriches that role but should not interfere with it”.

As the story of William Smart shows, the reality of raising a family may differ considerably from what is (or was) traditionally considered the norm. One thing is certain. By assuming responsibility in the day-to-day care of his family, he undoubtedly earned the eternal respect of his daughter Sonora.