Doug’s dinners
Chukkas Bar and Grill
Malta Polo Club, Marsa (opposite entrance to the Sports Club)
Tel: 2124 1224
Food: 8/10
Service: 8/10
Ambience: 8/10
Value: 8/10
Overall: 8/10
I know what you are thinking… didn’t he already review Chukkas? Well, to be honest, yes I did. But there are a couple of rather salient reasons for my return.
Eating this steak in front of the wife is about as close as I am ever likely to get to having an affair
Firstly, it was a long, long time ago and restaurants change over time. The menu changes, the service changes, the ambience changes and even the value for money changes.
Just because something was once brilliant doesn’t mean it will stay that way forever. Think Michael Schumacher.
On that basis I believe it is important, once in a while, to revisit some of my old haunts, both good and bad: keep the good ones on their toes and give those places that made my nipples itch another chance to impress.
The second reason I opted to revisit Chukkas was because the deputy editor of this newspaper made me.
Of course, that is not strictly true. I was not so much forced as gently, but persistently, cajoled in the direction of his choosing. He is a very persuasive chap, in the same way that a large gun can be persuasive.
Sharon and I were due to join him and his lovely wife for dinner, an event that had been rescheduled so often it had been first suggested back in the day when buses were orange and the possibility of divorce merely a glint in the Yes campaign’s eye.
We did eventually manage to tie down a mutually workable date which left only the venue to be decided. So I shot off an e-mail of potential destinations confident there would be something there to tickle his fancy.
“All nice, but how about Chukkas,” he replied.
So I sent him another list and he replied with just one word. Which began with C.
Now I am no Sherlock Holmes and even struggle at Cluedo, but I could definitely see a pattern forming here.
“Do you, by any remote possibility, want to go to Chukkas?”
As it turns out, deputy editor friend, let’s call him Herman purely and simply because that happens to be his name, had been desperately trying to go to Chukkas for months, pretty much since I had given it a glowing review. However, a combination of circumstance and schedule had made such a visit an impossibility.
This was his chance to tick something off his bucket list and he wasn’t going to go down without a fight.
And so I booked us a table for four at Chukkas.
The restaurant is, as you may or may not recall, located in Marsa, just opposite the entrance to Marsa Sports Club. It is, I believe, the official home of the Polo Club, which makes its location – built on the side of the horse racing track and overlooking the polo pitch – unsurprisingly appropriate.
After meeting outside we head up the stairs. The three-storey building consists of kitchens on the ground floor, main restaurant on the first and outdoor terrace on the second.
And it is to the top level we are headed. Being the tail end of summer dining al fresco is still an option.
We are met at the bar by Martin, the young, enthusiastic and lively owner. He guides us to our table on the racetrack side of the terrace.
Unfortunately, all is quiet and calm down below. I use the word unfortunate as, the first time I visited this particular place, it had been race night and that had added an almost surreal edge to proceedings.
Sitting there, tucking in to a steak so nice you want to make sweet love to it, while the race unfolds almost beneath your table is quite delightfully unusual.
However, with the racing season not quite here yet, we are going to have to make do with the relaxed atmosphere and superb food. Assuming, of course, it lives up to its history.
We order drinks to kick-start the evening and chat about current affairs – those of an international variety and those involving couples who should probably know better. A mixture of cutting-edge journalistic conversation and pure, unadulterated gossip.
Eventually, we are ready to start thinking about food. Martin brings over a large blackboard which pretty much serves as the menu at Chukkas. Keeping things fresh and seasonal is important here, so don’t expect things on the menu just for the sake of being there.
I leave the wine ordering to Herman and Ariadne. Whereas I can just about tell the difference between white and red, they actually have an idea (well, she does) of what they are talking about when it comes to the joys of the grape. Then it’s on to the food.
Sharon and I go for a mixed selection for starters while Herman goes for the beef carpaccio and Ariadne opts for the parmeggiano. For mains its pasta for Sharon, a T-bone for me and rib-eyes for the others.
As we wait for the starters to arrive we chat about food in general. It turns out that Herman has become a bit of a chef these days, a quite unexpected development.
A few years ago this man would struggle to boil an egg and I wouldn’t have trusted him not to burn ice-cream. These days he is a man on a culinary mission.
Our wine arrives and it proves our companions do know what they are talking about. A delightfully crisp white that should oil the wheels of conversation just nicely. And the wine is quickly followed by the starters.
Sharon and I divide up the various components of our platter like two children sharing Smarties. The items range from deep fried mozzarella balls to sausages with more spice than a 90s girl band. All excellent stuff.
Herman is enjoying the carpaccio while Ariadne gives her dish the thumbs up. “So easy to get wrong, but this is absolutely right,” she explains.
Between courses we help ourselves to plenty of fresh crunchy bread and get another bottle of wine to keep the tongues nice and loose.
Although it is a Friday night the restaurant isn’t completely full, but it’s still plenty busy. Service is not being affected in the slightest, however.
Before we know it, the mains are upon us. And once again I find myself falling deeply in love with a piece of Chukkas meat. I don’t often have a T-bone but I am oh so glad I did. Not only is it huge, which is always a bonus, it is cooked to perfection. Moist, juicy and tender but not to the extent that it lacks the substance and body it needs.
Eating this steak in front of the wife is about as close as I am ever likely to get to having an affair. I feel dirty but alive.
The muttered murmurings from the rest of the table indicate they are equally enamoured with their respective dishes. Although, to be fair, as long as I have my steak, they could be eating last week’s leftovers off rusty dustbin lids for all I care.
In the interests of fair play I offer everyone a taste of my steak but I do so in a way that suggests that if they accept, there is a fair to reasonable chance I may stab them. Luckily, they are all perfectly content with their own food.
Twenty minutes later and we are just about polished off. Great meat.
A waiter walks over and clears the plates, asking if we fancy dessert. Initially, I am reluctant to eat anything that might take away the aftertaste of the steak, but I suddenly recall Chukkas’ banoffie pie as being pretty good and my will snaps easier than a supermodel’s ankle in a skiing accident.
Between us we have two or three desserts, including the aforementioned banoffie and the home made chocolate brownie. All very good, although I can’t shake off the nagging feeling I am being ever so slightly unfaithful to my steak.
After coffees and a few nightcaps the time comes to draw a rather reluctant line under the evening. I go off to settle the bill, which comes in at around €40 a head – to my mind that is exceptionally good value for money.
All in all this particular revisit had been a success. Not only has Chukkas not let its standards slip, it has, if anything, refined and polished them while maintaining its place as my favourite meat destination on the island.
This is food as I have always believed it should be: hearty yet tasty, simple yet clever. Not a restaurant that shows off but one which instead focuses on its strengths and plays to them quite exceptionally well.
Would I recommend it to others? Absolutely. And the deputy editor? I would certainly think so.
And for a born-again foodie, that’s pretty high acclaim.
dougsdinners@timesofmalta.com
The scoring
When reviewing any restaurant I try to be as objective as possible and take into consideration all the different aspects which make for an enjoyable meal. The scores I give cannot be seen as a permanent result for a venue, but merely a reflection on how it performed on the occasion I was there. Also, it is important to note that comparisons between different restaurants’ marks should not be made. I score an establishment on how it performs within its own field, not against competitors in different catering sectors. For example, a cheap pizzeria that does what it does well is just as deserving of a high mark as a fine dining establishment would be.