Dear friends,

In his infinite wisdom, our C and L leader has seen fit to appoint me to not one... but two parliamentary commissions

Once again it’s me, your friendly, neighbourhood backbench MP, to bring you tidings of the deeds, both honourable and far-seeing, of our charismatic and lovable leader and his loyal disciples in the Government.

And just to prove what an honourable and far-seeing PM he is turning out to be, this past month has seen him and his adoring acolytes waste not a nano-second in fulfilling our party’s election manifesto.

For instance: The month of April not only saw our C and L leader start to sort out the mess at home, left by his predecessors, he also jetted off to France to give the friendly but rather backward frogs the benefit of his enormous wisdom, in rectifying some of their problems.

As most of you will know, the previous administration developed the habit of rectifying – or I should say – deferring every problem that presented itself, by simply establishing a new commission to present a report on the problem – and then ignoring or shelving the findings of that report. Well, no more! As soon as he assumed the reins of power, our C and L leader put an immediate stop to such nonsense.

Oh yes, he instantly gave orders for a series of brand new commissions to be formed, (consisting entirely of faithful leftish devotees and hangers-on... naturally) to prepare reports on the reports of the commissions set up by the previous shambolic government.

And to those to the extreme right of local politics, who have moaned constantly about the number of PL sympathisers, volunteers and patrons elected to serve on these commissions, I say: “Tough titty! What comes around goes around.”

But I don’t want you to think that our C and L leader has only been concerning his priceless time with rectifying the glaring faults inherent in every single commission set up by the previous government. Oh no, he’s even – believe it or not – found time to set up some shiny new commissions of his own. And this is where I come in.

You see, in his infinite wisdom, superman, otherwise known as our charismatic and lovable leader, has seen fit to appoint me to not one... but two parliamentary commissions. The first to look into and then write a report on the possibility of drilling for oil under the PN headquarters in Pietà.

And secondly: A parliamentary commission to prepare a report on the adoption of gay marriage in the Maltese islands. I have to say this is one commission I do not intend to tell my mother I am serving on. She still thinks same-sex unions means organised workers of the same gender.

At this point, it pains me to have to report a somewhat less than happy detail. It would appear that some users of social media have seen fit to post, what can only be described as salacious and – yes, jealous comments on Facebook and Twitter.

They apparently (I say apparently since I haven’t actually bothered to look for these comments... but have been informed of their content by friends and colleagues) see fit to erroneously attribute my lavish and well-deserved praise for our C and L leader, as an attempt to curry favour with same saintly personage, in the hope and expectation of being given a post within his glitteringly successful administration.

Nothing could be further from the truth! However, if indeed our C and L leader ever did see fit to raise me up to the level of parliamentary secretary or higher, then he should know that my gratitude, loyalty and total adulation will know no bounds.

Oh yes, my euphoria at the success – so far – of our new administration takes me back to those heady days of struggle with my fellow elves in the elfery at the Glass Menagerie... but I much prefer this.

Comments:

Illiterate at 1.46am writes:

“Beeyootifully sed, I kudn’t haf put it beta meyeself”

Tinkerbell at 4.17am writes:

Yet another rubbish post from the uncrowned king of the brown-nose club.