Monday, 7th July 2008
THE YUF SPEAKS
It is the silly season and all that, when columnists’ and bloggers’ minds should turn to lighter things than politics.
I could, for instance, go off onto a pastoral detour on the joys of summer and eating (or being eaten) out on balmy nights. The bucolic delights of lounging on the beach, or of luxuriating in a car on the way thereto, with the prospect of parking half-way up the hill towards Mellieha before getting to the actual beach, could have formed the core of this blog, avoiding the really hot subjects.
But you’ve got all the glossy mags for that sort of thing, with the added bonus of being able to spot a picture of the new, slim(mer) me, nestled amongst all the Sacha Farmer Timpkinson wannabes that grace the pages of “Circling Sunday First” in their full-colour, “look at me I should be in SITC” finery. How these people manage it, scooting from party to party to party, managing to change clothes and arm-candy on the way, is quite fascinating and could form the basis of a whole series of blogs, probably entitled “Look who (s)he’s with now, thought s(h)e was married”.
The thing is, that is the stuff of ephemera, reserved for the spaces between the ads and the chunks that are ads but pretend not to be, presumably because in the mind-set of the chattering classes, trade still smacks of crassness and mild vulgarity. Much nicer to pretend that the people putting the mag together want to talk to me, pretty picture an’all, ‘cos I’m a celebrity in my own right and not because, what a coincidence, my import company stuck a whole series of ads into this month’s edition.
If I were to do that, though, I’d probably get ignored and the choice between being ignored and having all manner of lil’elves fulminating at me, taking me all seriously like, is easy to make. Give me fulmination over oblivion any time.
So, it’s time to be poking sticks into bee hives again, or rattling cages or shaking trees or whatever it is one does to get things jumping, for all that it gets me called all manner of names and told I should stop writing this blog because it’s got boring and because I’m nothing more than a blinkered spokesman of the horrendous Nationalist Party. I’ll be told, most amusingly, that my stuff is repetitive and that my interlocutor will not be reading it anymore, which would be worrying, except for the fact that for every elf that abandons perusal of my oeuvre, two more take his place, imperfect spelling and syntax to the fore, to call me names and tell me they won’t be reading me anymore, either, so there.
On everyone’s lips, quite understandably, is the surcharge that the nasty Nationalists have slapped on our electricity bills, no doubt in order to make the fat friends of their friends even fatter and friendlier. It’s not really OPEC that has done this to us, it’s Gonzi himself, personally, because he and Kate had a fight and he’s prone to do that, he hits out at the population at large. He’s an uncaring beast that way.
And to make things worse, he just won’t listen, he knows it all and doesn’t think he needs to check with anyone before turning the screws on pensioners, the working class, single mothers, puppies and everyone and her sister. And taking away their apple pie,an’all.
Look at the MLP, on the other hand, led by St Joseph of the Glowing Halo. They would have consulted everyone, taken everyone’s views, taken into consideration the legitimate aspirations of all the special interest groups, not least of which would have been the hunting fraternity and the greens and anyone else whose vote might swing it – oh, hang on, that was then, this is now. Now these are hardly relevant considerations, now it’s the MLP itself that needs to be appeased, because votes don’t count for the next few years (not that you’d know that, the way the MLP keeps on and on about representing nearly half the population, as if this gives them dibs on governing the country)
Still, consultation and talking to everyone remains the order of the day, according to Labour’s young man at the helm. Before allowing energy prices to rise, instead of imitating Canute, the Government should have consulted stakeholders to establish the precise formula of the hike. Never mind that this was done some time ago, presumably while Dr Muscat was doing worthy things in Brussels: it needs to be done again because now he’s here, poised to save the world. Nope, the Government, presumably in the form of the Minister for Finance, who has little else to do (what’s trying to save the exchequer from the life-sucking influence of the shipyards compared with sitting down with the unions and the employers and all the rest of them, to go over the same tired stuff again and again, after all?) should have patiently sat down with the unions and the employers and the rest of them, to go over the same tired stuff again and again.
And before some lil’elf jumps in and says I’m repeating myself and that this is evidence of my failure to comprehend the niceties of the art of writing, I was being repetitive in order to illustrate the futility of talking about the same thing over and over, given that nothing has changed fundamentally. It’s called trying to be a bit comical, innit, you know?
But I forget, humour and a lightness of touch are weapons conspicuous by their absence from the lil’elves’ armoury.
Getting back to Dr CMJ, we shouldn’t be too hard on the young feller’m’lad, really.
He’s clearly taken with Blairism and heading off into the sunset down the Third Way, though we don’t talk about third ways here, there’s only one way, the one that will keep the MLP faithful, erm, faithful. We dress up the idea of talking to everyone and being nice to everyone, preferably in shirtsleeves and carrying a nice mug of coffee, in a costume of “the Government is wrong and we should be sitting there at the table not them”, which is like soft rain on a parched desert for the aforementioned faithful.
Keeping everyone happy, the way Muscat has done it with the Shadow Cabinet re-jig he’s pushed through, is a handy way of keeping the lid on things. Making statements of the bleedin’ obvious, such as “you should have consulted all the interested parties” (even though that was done way back) and “be excellent to everyone” and “love everyone”, make him look statesmanlike, because at a facile level, these platitudes shouldn’t irk anyone and therefore the person making them is a statesman, not a lowly party politician.
The problem is, as Blair discovered before him, there’s a gulf separating saying all these nice things and actually getting things done: the former is an easy exercise, the latter requires getting your hands a bit mucky. Giving all your MPs something to talk about, in the short run, will keep them quiet and beavering away at their corner of the pie, but eventually, when they’ve exhausted their subject, they’ll want to stick their oars into the sea of more weighty affairs.
That’s when things will get interesting.
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Comments
“Keeping everyone happy, the way Muscat has done it with the Shadow Cabinet re-jig he’s pushed through, is a handy way of keeping the lid on things. Making statements of the bleedin’ obvious, such as "you should have consulted all the interested parties” (even though that was done way back) and “be excellent to everyone” and “love everyone”, make him look statesmanlike, because at a facile level, these platitudes shouldn’t irk anyone and therefore the person making them is a statesman, not a lowly party politician.”
PP By the time I got to the end I had forgotten the beginning some eighty words back but it seems that Muscat is indeed a statesman because he makes platitudes that doesn’t irk anyone.
So that is all right then
ABC intends us to study his words and comment thereon.
Well I presume that that is the purpose of his exercise.
Let us consider his prepenultimate paragraph that contains one short sentence and one long
“Keeping everyone happy, the way Muscat has done it with the Shadow Cabinet re-jig he’s pushed through, is a handy way of keeping the lid on things. Making statements of the bleedin’ obvious, such as “you should have consulted all the interested parties” (even though that was done way back) and “be excellent to everyone” and “love everyone”, make him look statesmanlike, because at a facile level, these platitudes shouldn’t irk anyone and therefore the person making them is a statesman, not a lowly party politician.”
PP So we take firstly his first.
Do we take it that lids are kept on things by making everyone happy? Is everyone in MLP happy as a result of lids being kept on things? Are they all credulous fools? Maybe we should be told.
I will examine the last, longer, sentence in another posting.
D Bonello - duh.... come on, man.... I was KIDDING... :-)
I am sure that your posting is apposite, witty and to the point
but I cannot comprehend it.
@ James Hamilton:
I too am a pensioner and appreciate your situation.
I am given to understand that a large amount of electricity
is illegally abstracted in Malta.
Tax evasion-let alone tax avoidance, is rife in Malta
and is a characteristic of the upper class.
As a good Socialist I cry "soak the rich".
@ ABC I am still studying "The Yuf Speaks"
but find little of significance so far.
'@Nicholas Warren-I concur with your views.
@ Joe Martinelli - A tad strident.
I find this statement surprising when one considers the fact that:
1. our environment is of the worst quality to be found in the EU
2. our levels of illiteracy are significant
3. our earnings per capita are so poor
4. we are amongst the most heavily taxed in the EU
5. our transport system dates back to pre-history
6. we have one of the highest rates of children not living with both biological parents
7. we are the only country in the world bar one that does not have domestic divorce
8. we have 30,000 families who are so poor as to merit exemption from payment of surcharge
9. the waiting list at out General hospital is 'scandalous'
10. the quality of our roads is of 3rd world standards (despite improvement to the main arterial roads)
11. the cementization of Malta has become legendary
12. the preservation of our heritage has been patchy at best. Some individual good effort (ex St John's) yet an overall state of heart wrenching disrepair...sorry, have ran out of space
Stage 1: a sharp and permanent increase in price
Stage 2 : oil supply will eventually not be able to satisfy world demand.
Since the 1990s nations considered and implemented counter-measures.
Stage one is now with us and finds Malta quasi 100% oil dependant with no vision as how to
a. implement measures to increase efficient utilisation of oil
b. source alternative sources of energy
This lack of policy/vision compromises Malta’s competitiveness in terms of its reliance on oil.
Some ideas:
initiate measures to reduce oil consumption in transportation.
develop non-fossil fuel electricity generation through a combination of renewables and nuclear power. The latter is best developed jointly with France as a regional leader in the sector.
adopt tax incentives to encourage hybrid car purchases and introduce a scrappage scheme as new public transport facilities come on stream
introduce congestion charges to discourage private car usage as adequate public transport facilities come on stream.
encourage teleworking practices to reduce home to workplace travel.
reallocate school-population to minimise home/school transport requirements. (note how traffic-volume shrinks during school holidays).
(and not once did I mention Government mis-rule :)
Even though we don't like it, it’s something that we have to live with; I guess that a lot of people, irrespective of their political conviction, will be tightening their belts in the very near future.
Being a pensioner I admit that I’m feeling the pinch, not only with the price of oil, and the surcharge, but with inflation in general.
Being conscientious of global warming and doing my bit for the environment, I recently opted to buy a washing machine, the environmentally friendly type’ which meant that I am entitled to a 50 Euro rebate. Four months later I am still waiting, although I’ve heard that particular fund has run dry.
What infuriates me, is that this government was quick enough to grant an amnesty to certain tax evaders to the tune of 2.3 million (I’m not sure if it was Lira or Euros) regardless, it’s still a lot of money, certainly money that this
government can ill afford to write off.
I agree that the govt does not know it all but hey, they have led the country for 20 years and did a hell of a good job on most issues. What I cannot understand is how you're blaming the govt for the surcharge... read the FT and you'll see that it has exploded... if govt does not recover the cost how can we have electricity... oil does not come for free you know... alternatively govt could increase taxes and not increase the surcharge... so there you have it you get the end of the stick one way or another... if you want to reduce your bill, take measures such as using energy saving bulbs.. dont leave the water heater on all night use a timer and start thinking of investing in alternative energy... for the latter not everyone may afford it but by using some common sense everyone can save on his/her bill...
re CMJ... well he's trying to be liked by all to garnish the votes which is why he is there but he also needs to garnish his act to show that he can really be a statesman and leader of Malta
You are quite right. The Labour party leader has turned out to be a carbon copy of his predecessor. For every seemingly benign move, he stings you twice with little regard to contradictions and spins. Nothing has changed. Not that we did not anticipate all this and his lectures at village clubs are proof that attached strings still lead to Dottor Sant. Just for insurance, the brainy delegates elected two old hands steeped in Labour's old ways of doing business.
Take the surcharge issue. What's there to discuss? We cannot control the price of oil, so we have to pay whatever they ask for. But, take heart because it seems that 'secret' OPEC representatives were in Siggiewi and noted Joseph's remarks about oil prices and the need of consultations. So much so, that in an emergency meeting, they consulted and reduced the price of a barrel by two dollars! Keep it up Joseph until the producers see your light and go back to a $12.00 a barrel!
Nothing has changed - vide MaltaToday article of July 2 - Spy on thy neighbour - and cry.
No surprise - we knew it.
The actual words that he spoke on the shore of Bosham are traditionally as follows:
"Let all men know how empty and worthless is the power of kings. For there is none worthy of the name but God, whom heaven, earth and sea obey".
The Saxon Chronicles go on to say:
So spoke the King, seated on his throne with the waves lapping around his feet. "Go back, sea!" he commanded time and again, but the tide continued as expected. Canute put it to his courtiers that the sea was not obeying him and insisted they stay there until they admitted it.
The Maltese love legends!
To turn to more up to date matters I commend the posting of C Bartolo who shoots the Boccaman down in flames with blue smoke trailing from his bum. That is in relation to Blair for whom ABC has a detestation exceeded only by his opinion of Mr Muscat.
I will study further the latest effusion from ABC and will no doubt find much to praise.
Blair managed to make the system work because he did not sit on his behind and watch the sunset. He actually worked for the national interest, unlike those sitting in Auberge de Castille at the moment. I believe that the government does NOT know it all, and should still consult the social partners when dealing with matters as important as the surcharge; which will affect everyone's pockets; leaving elves and the rest at the bad end of the stick.
Instead of piling on the tariffs, the government should have seek the least costly ways to solving this problem as at the end of the day the public has to make up for the lack of action from the government's part.