You know the football world is teetering on the brink of insanity when Graziano Pellè becomes the fifth highest paid player on the planet.
The Italian international moved from Southampton to Chinese side Shandong Luneng last week for €15 million, a fee that is, in itself, a bit expensive for a player who turns 31 in the next few days. Were he 21 and on the way up then maybe, but in striker terms he is now entering the twilight of his career.
But more shocking than the fee – far, far more shocking – is the player’s wage: Pellè is being paid more than €300,000 a week by the Chinese club. Yep, that’s just over €15 million a year.
If a player like him can command that sort of wage in China, then what would someone like Lionel Messi be paid over there? A million a week? Two million? Three? Because, with all due respect, Pellè is hardly one of the greats of the modern game.
He’s had a decent career, don’t get me wrong, but despite playing for clubs as varied as Lecce, Parma, Feynoord and Southampton, he was only deemed good enough for a full Italy cap at the age of 29. And this isn’t exactly the hardest Italy squad to get into.
Moves like this one signal the dawn of a dangerous new era for the modern game.
European clubs are going to have to start paying average players ludicrous amounts of money just to stop them being drawn to the Asian millions like moths to the Stade de France
For years, football had to contend with the traditional European giants splashing out big money on players and pushing prices up. Then we had the influx of mega-rich owners prepared to spend hundreds of millions to buy success, once again driving up transfer fees and wages.
But those inflationary factors are going to look insignificant if this Chinese football revolution gains further momentum. European clubs are going to have to start paying average players ludicrous amounts of money just to stop them being drawn to the Asian millions like moths to the Stade de France.
Obviously Europe doesn’t have a monopoly on the top footballers. And as such, we shouldn’t begrudge China its attempt to muscle its way in to the big time. (Although I am not entirely sure how paying someone a million-plus euros a month fits in with that whole communism thing).
But these are scary times for a sport that is, in Europe at least, already spending money beyond sustainable means.
Having said all that, good luck to Pellè. He and his agent have pulled off a major coup that doesn’t just set him up for life but also ensures his children and his children’s children will probably never need to work for a living.
And to think it was only a couple of weeks ago that this man was hanging his head in shame after telling Manuel Neuer how he was going to score his penalty and then promptly missing the goal completely.
I can only assume the television feed in China must have gone down at that point. Unless Shandong Luneng’s owners are German and this is their way of saying thank you…
Is it over yet?
In many ways last Sunday’s final was a fitting way to round off Euro 2016 – a mostly mundane match that will not live long in anyone’s memory.
The fact that the two biggest talking points in the game between France and Portugal were an injury and an invasion of moths just about sums up how uninspiring it was.
To be fair, finals do have a habit of being cagey and cautious with so much at stake. Nobody wants to make the mistake that could cost them, their team and their nation the trophy.
The problem for Uefa is that this lack of excitement didn’t just affect the final – it afflicted more than three-quarters of the games in France this summer.
Out of the 51 encounters, there were no more than five or six which could be described as being properly enjoyable games of football. And there wasn’t a single match that I would describe as unforgettable.
Although it’s always nice to see a new nation join the list of champions, the fact that Portugal managed to lift the trophy despite only winning one game in normal time is another indicator of the low standards of Euro 2016.
Is this overall defensive approach down to the expansion to 24 teams? More than likely, yes. The opening group games, which often saw a lesser team defending for 90 minutes while their more illustrious opponents tried to break them down, seemed to set the theme for the entire tournament.
That’s not to say, of course, that there weren’t any highlights over the past month. The plucky resilience and never-say-die attitude of the Iceland team and the utter brilliance of their supporters will live long in the memory. As will the Viking chant, which you can expect to see fans trying (and failing) to emulate all over Europe next season.
But generally speaking, I almost wish I had spent those 30 or so days and those 80 hours doing something a bit more productive. And it’s not often you will hear me say that when it comes to watching football. Or being productive.
Uefa needs to change the formula before Euro 2020. Whether that is less teams, more teams or even something more radical like changing the number of points awarded for wins and draws, I don’t know.
The bottom line is that if the European Championship wants to maintain its status as one of the greatest tournaments in the world, we can’t have another snorefest like this one.
New balls please
Have you seen the new footballs that are going to be used in the Spanish, English and Italian top flights next season? No? Count yourself lucky.
It boggles the mind that a company of the size and stature of Nike, which probably has a team of the world’s best designers on the payroll, can come out with a football that looks like it has been created by a group of largely disinterested five-year-olds.
From what I can see, the pompously named ‘Ordem 4’ ball, comes in a variety of colours, none of which even remotely make it look like a football. And the thick stripes all over it look like Nike was trying to use up some old rolls of electrician’s tape they found lying around.
I’m all for innovation when it comes to the flight of the ball, for example. But can the major sports companies please stop trying to outdo each other with designs that only look good if you have been at the jar of magic mushrooms.
There was nothing wrong with the old black and white hexagonal design was there? Or the plain white one? And don’t give me the ‘this one is more visible’ crap either.
If a professional player needs help seeing a white ball on a green football pitch then he probably shouldn’t be playing the game in the first place. I didn’t see Pelé, Johan Cruyff or Diego Maradona struggling to play with balls that hadn’t been dipped in a bucket of melted crayons.
And if supporters were struggling to see the ball on TV – the other argument we often hear – don’t you think there may have been a bit of an outcry before now? It’s not like people have been sat staring at their TVs for the past 60 years wondering why 22 men are running round a rectangle of grass for no apparent reason.
Truth be told I can’t think of one good reason to keep changing the design of footballs in the top flight, cups and tournaments.
Oh, hang on, I just checked online. The Ordem 4 retails at roughly €120, as opposed to €10 for a normal ball.
That’ll be the reason then…
sportscolumnist@timesofmalta.com
Twitter: @maltablade