Men have something to learn when it comes to detecting signs of their partner’s interest in sex.
When it comes to new encounters or fictitious targets, men tend to perceive greater sexual interest in women’s behavior than in reality, studies have shown.
But when in an already established relationship, men tend to underestimate their romantic partner’s sexual desires, according to a new research that was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
The biased under-perception of women’s sex drive may be functional for a working relationship, since it is associated with their partner feeling more satisfied and committed to the relationship.
Under-perception may minimize sexual rejection, which would help maintain the quality of the relationship.- Amy Muise
"Our findings suggest that under-perception might keep men motivated to entice their partner's interest, and it may also minimize sexual rejection, which would help maintain the quality of the relationship,” said Amy Muise, a post-doctoral relationship researcher at the University of Toronto and lead author of the research.
Men seemed to underestimate their partner’s sex drive especially on days when they were more motivated to avoid sexual rejection.
This underestimation bias can in part be attributed to men’s higher levels of sexual desire than women in general.
"(The findings) are surprising in the sense that it's the opposite bias that men tend to show in initial encounters, but we did expect that these biases would differ in established relationships," Muise told CNN.
"It makes sense, since the goal in initial encounters might be to attract a partner, so over-perceiving their interest can help men feel more comfortable initiating a conversation or date. But the goal in relationships is to maintain the relationship," she continued.
The researchers saw no consistent over- or under-perception bias in women.
"But, when women were higher in desire or on days when they were more motivated to avoid rejection, they demonstrated an under-perception bias as well," Muise said.
Under-perception may minimize sexual rejection, which would help maintain the quality of the relationship.- Amy Muise
"This suggested to me that it is not just about gender but about who is higher in desire. Men tend to be higher in desire than women, on average, in relationships."
The research was mostly conducted on heterosexual couples. The results in same-sex couples followed the same pattern, although the researchers noted the samples of same-sex couples in the study was too small to make a valid conclusion.
Assistant professor of Psychology of Florida State University Andrea Meltzer, not a part of the study, found the results surprising.
"People's behaviors are a function of their judgments and perception. That is, they tend to react to their partners based on their perception of their relationships," she said.
"For example, if they perceive their partners as satisfied, they tend to behave more positively. Thus, to have the most complete understanding of relationships, it is important to understand the source and function of intimate perceptions."