Trying to adopt a child is an arduous journey not many understand unless they go through the process themselves. Sarah Carabott spoke to three prospective adoptive parents who have not yet given up.

“Adopting is a long journey and when you think you have arrived, you find the door closed. But I’m going to try other doors,” a woman who has just been rejected by Slovakian authorities told this newspaper.

Katya*, 45, attended a compulsory preparatory course at the end of last summer with her partner of 10 years. This was followed by the regular procedure, which included home visits, and medical and psychological reports.

Once given the go-ahead, she applied for adoption from Slovakia as a single applicant, because the Maltese Central Authority (which handles adoptions) informed her that the country accepted such applications.

When the documents left this April, the “real wait” started, and barely a week later she received a call, as expected.

“I was expecting a call to inform me I needed to submit more documentation, because you cannot expect things to go smoothly. Instead, I was told I was not even being considered.

“My first reaction was not to lose hope, but when it was confirmed that the documentation was sent back, I went through three emotional days,” she said, leafing through a book with photos she prepared for the prospective adopted child.

All her documentation has been sent back, and the reply she received read: “Slovakia accepts only married heterosexual couples. Single parents could be accepted only exceptionally when a placement with a single parent is in the best interest of the child. We don’t have such children in our registry.”

“Why didn’t they keep the documents on standby, in case such an availability came up? Do they accept single applicants, as our local authorities informed us, or not?” she asked, insisting she was not blaming anyone.

A spokeswoman for a private agency that helps out prospective parents with inter-country adoptions noted that local agencies only got to know that single applicants were not being accepted when the documents were sent back.

In fact, she said the Central Authority had issued the necessary documentation so that applicants could send their dossier to Slovakia.

Katya, who has so far spent €2,800 and “has not even started the adoption process”, has turned her focus on India, which she says is her only other option as a single applicant.

When you think you have arrived, you find the door closed. But I’m going to try other doors

Meanwhile, a couple who has already spent at least €37,000 started the process in February 2014, and was given the green light to adopt by October. They first enrolled within Malta’s and Slovakia’s waiting lists. In March of 2015 they were told that they could try adopt from the US through an infant adoption programme.

Sadly, soon after they decided to pull out of the Slovakian list to focus their efforts on the US, they were told that the process had been halted by the Maltese authorities.

“It’s unclear how and why it was halted. It seems like we are getting stuck everywhere we look. We have been everywhere and spoken to everyone. We haven’t lost heart yet, as we would really like to adopt after 10 years of marriage,” Mark* told this newspaper, noting they have now restarted the process and will be applying with Slovakia again.

Other prospective parents have come close to giving up. Christian*, who sat for the course with his wife of seven years in November of 2014, was given the go-ahead in May of last year.

They took out a loan and applied with Bulgaria and Slovakia. However, after a year on the waiting list, they decided to widen their age and gender preferences.

This meant they needed to redo their documentation all over, which they submitted in February, and for which they only received an acknowledgement three weeks later, because of what Christian believes is lack of human resources.

Christian said it took him a lot of courage to decide to adopt, and the frustrating hitches along the way made him feel like giving up at times.

*Names have been changed

A human resources crisis

The adoption process is tiring out prospective parents psychologically, emotionally and financially, according to Nationalist Party spokesman for family affairs Robert Cutajar.

Frustration about inter-country adoption has been sounded several times over the years. When over two years ago, parents told this newspaper that countries were “closing their doors one by one”, the Maltese government had said it was in talks with Slovakia.

Adopting children from Malta is difficult and former family minister Marie-Louise Coleiro Preca had drawn up a Child Protection Bill that, among other initiatives, was to introduce mechanisms to free up children for adoption in cases where all attempts to reunite them with birth parents failed.

This Bill, on hold for more than two years, has since been amended and the new draft, seen by this newspaper, does not mention adoptions. The Opposition has not been given access to the new Bill, which has been criticised for lack of consultation.

In the meantime, PN MPs Robert Cutajar and Paula Mifsud Bonnici met stakeholders to draw up the Opposition’s position on child affairs.

Speaking to this newspaper, Mr Cutajar questioned the Family Ministry’s commitment and priorities within the sector. He insists that there is a human resources crisis in the sector and believes there have been no adoptions since the beginning of the year.

He has also fielded several parliamentary questions, but the replies did not reflect the experience of prospective parents who spoke to him.

In February, Family Minister Michael Farrugia said in Parliament that adoptions from Albania and Slovakia were open, while adoptions of Russian children had not been halted.

Adoptions from the US, Ghana and Cambodia were not possible while adoptions from Bulgaria and Kosovo had been put on hold.

Questions sent to the ministry remain unanswered.