It’s hard to believe, I know, but apparently a few – a very few – of my readers appear to think that I fail to see the blemishes in my hero, Jo-zeff’s character. Rubbish! I pride myself in being totally objective when it comes to discussing the myriad triumphs of our great charismatic and loveable (c and l) paramount chief.

For goodness sake! How on earth am I expected to find fault with the faultless? The man is a paragon of wonderfulness, an example to anyone and everyone striving for perfection! We are talking about the next best thing to... to Cliff Richard! So let’s hear no more of your petty griping!

To other matters: With summer a fast fading memory, it did at least give us politicians – well, those of us of the left, that is – the opportunity to take stock of our, so far, amazingly successful administration. And to acknowledge that there may, just may be one or two of Jo-zeff’s lieutenants who are, shall we say, not quite up to the job with which they have been entrusted.

You know who you are, Joe M and Kon et al. But don’t think Jo-zeff is unaware of your shortcomings. Just last week, when I happened upon our c and l leader in the Members’ gents (and not the other way around) in Parliament, he assured me that he knows exactly who cuts the mustard and who will shortly be sent out on ‘gardening leave’.

And, I’ve no doubt he will soon act and... he knows just who he can trust to do an impeccable job for both our country and himself. Yes, I stand ready and willing.

But let me tell you this: If that incompetent little toad Manwel jumps the queue again and – to scramble a metaphor – leapfrogs me to a ministry... especially after the mess he made of his one and only shot last time... I shall – I shall stamp my foot and shout a really rude word, so be warned!

But let’s not dwell on the seamier side of politics, for Jo-zeff has brought a shining light into the lives of all who dwell in and on our islands. With the possible exception of some of the more hardline members of the Opposition. But I have it on very good authority that even some of these misguided souls are coming round to our way of thinking and doing politics.

Why not construct Is-Salvatur Mark Two’s statue facing the Mintoff monument?

You know, I often ask myself: could our c and l leader do any more to up his profile and bring to the country’s unwavering attention his awesome qualities. And... yes, I believe he is missing a trick here.

I recently saw, on You Tube a video of the Russian leader, Vladimir Putout, shirtless and butch, regarding the camera with a distant and manly stare. There are no more virile capos on the planet than Jo-zeff, so why not a shirts-off video from him? He could even enhance his image on film by maybe shaving off what’s left of his head hair... that shouldn’t take long. Oh yes, masculinity rules... even here in apathetic Malta.

Have you noticed the groundswell of support for something I – modestly – suggested some time ago? I am referring to my proposal to erect a statue of our great leader, Jo-zeff.

The prevailing wisdom states that in order to deserve a statue... you first have to be dead... why? I feel the opposite should be true.

I mean, what is the point of sticking up a statue when the person whose statue it is, is no longer around to appreciate it?

Is-Salvatur Mark One is getting a monument in Castille Square, so why not construct Is-Salvatur Mark Two’s statue facing the Mintoff monument?

Suggestions are welcome.

Comments:

Johnny foreigner writes: Who is – or was – this ‘Mintorfe’ bloke to warrant a monument?

Gvern in waiting writes: Good question.

Il-veteran writes: How dare you insult the memory of the greatest dictator this country ever had.