All this fuss about a scrap of unbuilt-on land at Żonqor, it makes me smile. I mean... it’s not as if there is a shortage of development land available locally. Truly, there are vast expanses of useless countryside hereabouts simply crying out for ‘improvement’.

We should all be joining the Prime Minister in rejoicing that this Arabic American university... what­have­you, has chosen us for its new premises. Would that many more rich Arab states would do the same.

Look, this island isn’t half ruined – sorry, I mean built all over... yet. So today, in the hope that some wealthy Gulf State may read this, I – with my public service hat on – would like to suggest a few more suitable locations for universities... bogus or otherwise.

For a start, I cannot believe that Malta International Airport needs all that spare land around the terminal and runways. All they really require is enough space either side of the runway to stop the wings of airliners taking off or landing from bashing into any adjacent buildings; say 10 metres either side.

The rest of the area could be developed as yet another industrial estate, or a sports complex, or even... yes – a new university.

OK, so occasionally – very occasionally – a plane may collide with a building or two. But hey! Look at the big picture... think of the value we would be getting out of that extra land utilisation.

When you really get to thinking about it, there is so much waste and wasted land here that could be put to much better use.

Take Ta’ Qali: what earthly use is all that virgin terrain? You could build two or more universities on all that pointless greenery... plus the apparently necessary park.

Here’s what they should do: stick up the university campus in the footprint of the football stadium and its environs. This would sort out two problems. It would allow the builders a nice flat area to build on and it would eliminate the epicentre of Malta’s constant sporting humiliation.

I reckon there is enough available pastoral land on Malta and Gozo to stick up a dozen or more universities

And here’s another thing: what’s the point of the so-called parkland to be attached to the Żonqor development? Search me. There’s enough space down there for lots more buildings. Why waste it on useless parkland?

Another long-running saga in the press recently concerns the objections raised to a proposed new shooting range near Tarġa Gap. Have you seen how much wilderness there is up there?

I cannot for the life of me see what difference an environmentally friendly gun club could have.

I hear the objection is on the grounds of noise pollution, guns going bang, bang and all that. Ha! Just take a wander up to that neck of the woods any day in the year – in or out of legal hunting seasons – it’s like a busy day at the Somme.

Seriously, I reckon there is enough available pastoral land on Malta and Gozo to stick up a dozen or more universities. Or there would be if the government really wanted it.

Take Gozo, OK, so the locals may not exactly be enthusiastic about having an Arabic Sorbonne... sorry... Yale, on their doorstep, but it is needed. Gozo is practically a wilderness... at the moment. Hardly built on at all... ahem.

So that means lots of spare territory to be developed and exploited.

For instance, there’s that great swathe of land near Xewkija, where the helicopter used to take off and land. That would be perfect for a university or two.

Then there’s all that unused terrain near Ta’ Ċenc, it’s not much use as agricultural land so why not stick up a university or two there?

Ah, but now I hear the Prime Minister wants this particular development to go up in the south of Malta. Fair enough, so why not build it on what is currently the Marsa Sports Club? Most of that wide expanse of territory is occupied by a golf course – and our truly Socialist government surely regards such things as elitist and expendable.

So there’s your answer Dr M. It’s OK, don’t thank me... I’m just pleased to be of service.

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