Is there no end to Jo-zeff’s greatness? OK I know that’s a rhetorical question, to which the answer is obviously: No, his triumphs continue and will carry on doing so as long as he remains firmly in charge of the country... and beyond.

Following on from yet another batch of mega-triumphs in both the spring hunting referendum and the local council elections he now sits atop a government with both a stonking parliamentary majority, plus the vast majority of local councils. And what about Gozo; I mean: we knew he was mega-popular there, but omnipotent? Well now he is!

Oh, and don’t forget the fact that Jo-zeff – single-handedly – earned our brave hunters the legal right to blast out of the skies anything and everything that flies... excluding manned aircraft, of course... lol... during the six months of spring... apart from the rest of the year.

What an achievement! What a man! A Mediterranean colossus! A demi-god among mere mortals.

Yes I know my mother – a late convert to the Jo-zeff camp – wishes he had a bit more hair, was few inches taller and didn’t look like Alfred E. Newman, but to me – and thousands like me – the man is a giant, a leviathan, a monster of Maltese politics... Is-Salvatur mark two!

Phew, all that adoration has quite taken it out of me. But it does help in my proscribed task of lauding all that Jo-zeff says and does – and defending all his perceived cock-ups.

Like, for instance, the elevation of his buddy Cy-the-fly to a sinecure in Brussels, in order to be with his, ahem... partner. Personally, I think it’s very compassionate of our charismatic and loveable leader to go to all that trouble for some inadequate little turncoat... let alone rewarding him with an eye-watering salary. Oh that I should be so lucky! But no, that is churlish of me: Good luck to him, say I... even if I don’t really mean it.

To matters of no less import, but nonetheless related. I see just lately it has become somewhat trendy to jump on Josef’s sleek bandwagon and dub oneself a ‘soldier of steel’, and now I find that no less a nonentity than little tubby Manuel is at it.

Not only does our fearless leader get us cheap power, courtesy of the Chinese, he also – in one fell swoop – revitalises our entire film industry

Rumours abound about just what our charismatic and loveable leader intends to do with the grotesque little blob, not ruling out that he might well do a Johnny Dalli with him and pack him off to Brussels or make him foreign minister (Some might say it’s the same thing).

And no, this is not sour grapes on my part after I was ludicrously overlooked for the somewhat rotund little squit’s ministerial post. Absolutely not! It’s just that – at the time – it amazed me that Jo-zeff bypassed me... that’s all. Soldier of steel? Buffoon of blubber more like. No matter, my back is broad.

At the risk of being accused of hyperbole, I just have to say a monumental prosit to... guess who? Yes, of course, to Jo-zeff, for having both the foresight and the nous to hitch Malta’s wagon to the People’s Republic of China. Everybody knows that this mighty empire is the next great, dominant world power... nay, world leader.

Yes Jo-zeff – bless him – even went so far as to force one of his junior ministers, Konrad to be precise, to marry an influential Chinese woman, who he then put to work on our behalf. What vision! What a man!

So not only does our fearless leader get us cheap power, courtesy of the Chinese, he also – in one fell swoop – revitalises our entire film industry, by getting our new-found oriental buddies to shoot the majority of their blockbusters here – amazing!

But Jo-zeff, not content with liberating our brave hunters, sweeping the board... well almost... in the local elections, and making mighty China our number one ally, has even found time to sort out the Libya and irregular immigrants problem... Or he would have done if he had had his way.

Never mind; he tried and Jo-zeff is nothing if not a trying super-statesman.

Comments:

Labour pains writes:

“God bless you backbencher. You are a lone voice of reason in a world of doubters.”

On the way back writes:

“Make the most of it losers – and be prepared for a shock come the next general election... or maybe the one after that... or...”