Gary Coleman will be leading the stand-up band at the next edition of the Eden Comedy Club. He tells Jo Caruana about his wife, kids… and about getting shot at.

Gary Coleman

We all have heroes growing up. For me it was Cosmopolitan magazine editor Sam Baker; for comedian Gary Coleman it was ‘funny men’ – Morecambe and Wise, Ronnie Barker and Danny Kaye, to name but a few.

Coleman (who insists he is not the American actor best known for his role in Diff’rent Strokes) grew up on a council estate in the north east of England.

“Back then, becoming a comedian seemed as likely as going to the moon,” he tells me.

He was born into a family of coal miners and has early memories of being at his grandfather’s house in Boldon Colliery (a little pit village) watching Danny Kaye’s Hollywood comedy musical The Court Jester.

“I was about eight then and completely transfixed by my father’s and grandfather’s re-actions – they were crying with laughter,” says Coleman.

“I remember telling them, proudly, that I wanted to be a comedian and tap dancer like Danny Kaye when I grew up. From the looks on their faces I realised it probably wasn’t going to be an option. It was a bit of a Billy Elliott moment... except that I never did learn to dance.”

Instead, Coleman joined the army and it wasn’t until 20 years later that he finally plucked up the courage to follow his childhood dream.

“Although, nowadays I seem anything but shy, back then I was; it took me a good long while before I was ready to tell my family I wanted to be a stand-up comic. Looking back I don’t know why I was so nervous – my dad was over the moon.

“In fact, the three proudest gigs I have played were when my mum and dad came to London to watch me play to an audience of a couple of thousand at the Hackney Empire, with Michael McIntyre at the Bloomsbury Theatre and, recently, at my own little comedy club in the north of the city.”

Naturally (and despite the complete lack of psychical resemblance) Coleman has drawn comparisons to his namesake. He once performed at a gig in New York to a largely-black American audience.

When the emcee announced that Gary Coleman was next on stage, the audience went nuts in anticipation.

“The disappointment was palpable when a bald, white Geordie stumbled out. I actually thought they might lynch me. I still occasionally wonder whether people in the audience are just very disappointed, with Diff’rent Strokes fans staring at me thinking: this is the worst tribute act I’ve ever seen.”

Despite that, though, Coleman’s career has thrived. His first-ever gig was an open spot in London to an audience of around 60 people. “It was the most terrifying and exhilarating thing I’d ever done,” he says.

It was a bit of a Billy Elliot moment... except that I never did learn to dance

“And I’ve been shot at. Several times, although not since starting comedy. That gig was amazing and I immediately knew that comedy was what I wanted to do.”

However, later that night, Coleman had to deploy from Brize-Norton to West Africa, working as a medic in support of the Airborne Forces.

“That was pretty intense – but still but nowhere near as exhilarating as the comedy gig,” he quips.

The day he returned he resigned from the army and started his new life as a comic. “It was April 1, which seemed appropriate,” he says. “My commanding officer thought I was joking.

“My second gig was horrific, though. I was so nervous that I forgot every joke and left the stage to deafening silence. It was about a year before I had another gig as good as the first. I’ve since discovered, through talking to other comics, that this is a common experience. The first gig is typically great and you then spend a year or two being dreadful.”

But, since that shaky first year in the limelight, there has been no stopping him. Coleman has played everywhere from the London Comedy Store to the Edinburgh Festival, and has been called “fearlessly funny” by the popular magazine GQ and “highly inventive” by acclaimed comedian Frank Skinner.

Nevertheless he still refers to himself as the “UK’s best-kept comedy secret”.

Now, his upcoming Malta gig will be the latest in a stream of well-received performances. So, I wonder, has he planned his set?

“I’ve never written a joke in my career,” he tells me. “Fortunately, my family are insane – my wife, kids, even the dog. It makes for great comedy. It’s just a bit of a pain to live through it at the time.”

And, along with finding the funny in the mundanity of everyday life, he’s also been lucky enough to find inspiration in the many zany things he’s done over the years – from working as a snowboarding instructor to living with the Samburu tribes people in Africa.

“My memories always find their way into my set somehow. And I’m also interested in exploring the big questions: politics, philosophy, my dog’s sexual habits. Anything really, as long as I can get away with being a tiny bit rude.”

Now he is eager to get here. “I have heard, from every comic who has even done a gig in Malta, that it’s brilliant and that audiences are fantastic. I also can’t wait to finally see the island. When I was in the army one of my best mates, Jerry Clare, was Maltese (to be fair, I suspect he still is) and I heard only lovely things about Malta.

“Oh and my wife is coming along. It’s interesting that, in 10 years of marriage, my wife has probably only watched me perform four times, and yet she was suddenly very keen to see my show in Malta. She was less keen on watching my show in Aldershot last week… but I can’t think why.”

The 12th edition of Eden Comedy’s Stand Up Comedy Night take place on May 8 at 8.30pm at the Eden Cinemas, St Julian’s.

www.edencinemas.com.mt