Pope Francis hugs children during a meeting with youth at the University of Santo Tomas in Manila on January 18, 2015. An emotional Pope, moved by the tears of an abandoned child, said the world needed to “learn how to cry” over the plight of the millions of poor, hungry, homeless and abused children. Photo: Reuters/Romeo Ranoco

The future of the family is at the top of the agenda of Pope Francis. He not only comes out in defence of the family, but is also offering a road map for the future of the family and gave us the identity kit of the traditional family: a family open to life with the maximum of three children – fruit of the love between a man and a woman with responsible sex.

Pope Francis speaks of “a stable union between man and woman”, which is far from just the Catholic family. A ‘stable union’ includes men and women who are married, in a civil union or cohabiting.

Quite rightly the Pope does not put the latter unions on the same level with the bond of the sacrament of marriage.

Today in large cities, the number of civil marriages exceeds the number of religious marriages. In Milan, 60 per cent are civil marriages. There was a time when people in civil marriages were excommunicated, like the famous case of the Bishop of Prato in the late 1950s.

Recently the Pope baptised babies of cohabiting couples and of divorcees in the Sistine Chapel. This shows that the Pope wishes to be a true Pastor Bonus and reach out to the “the 99 sheep outside the fold”.

This is why the Pope called a synod on the family and he has exhorted the local bishops’ conferences to come out with a pastoral solution regarding the position of remarried divorcees.

The big decision in the ordinary synod opening next October will be whether remarried divorcees should receive communion. Al­though cardinals and bishops are of two different minds, it will be up to Pope Francis to take the final decision, after listening to both sides.

We Maltese rightly felt insulted when British Labour Minister Aneurin Bevan said: ‘The Maltese breed like rabbits’

Only 25 members of the synod are remarried divorcees and women, and many feel the Pope should listen more to such people. In his priestly ministry Pope Francis has had to deal with many divorcees and the denial of communion is a great pain for him. To quote the late Cardinal Carlo Maria Martini: “It seems as if we want to punish these people and deprive them from the Eucharist in a moment they need it most.”

Pope Francis recently held a private audience with a Spanish trans­gender man and his fiancée after they were rejected by his Catholic parish and called “the devil’s daughter” by his pastor. This shows how open is the Pope’s heart to the wounded in ‘the field hospital’ (the Church). This person had written to the Pope asking him if there is a ‘corner’ for him in the Church, as he was a devout Catholic. The Pope opened the Vatican for them!

However, the Pope stressed the fact that he will not departing from the Catholic teaching. Some American fundamentalists, including some bishops, have unjustly criticis­ed the Pope as not being pro-family and pro-life. The address at the synod, and his recent meeting with families in Manila, the Philippines, shows how much the welfare of families is at heart and in the mind of Jorge Mario Bergoglio.

Pope Francis poses for a selfie with a newly-wed couple during his Wednesday general audience in Paul VI hall at the Vatican. Photo: Reuters/Tony Gentile

Throughout the debate within the Church on the issues of gay couples, adoption by gays, communion to divorcees, contraception, and celibacy of the clergy, Pope Francis rests on the pillars of the traditional Catholic doctrine. In no way has he moved away, but he is helping the Church come to grips with the pastoral problems created by ‘the signs of the times’ in the light of the doctrine.

The Pope is deeply aware that the family is under attack in the western world. He said: “Every threat against the family is a threat to society itself.” While making verbose declarations on human rights, the United Nations and the European Parliament, besides various governments, legislate against the rights of the life of families. The very latest is the EU proposal to include abortion as ‘a human right’.

Marriage and fatherhood are in crisis. Today, 42 per cent of marriages end in divorce and more than a million children in England are grow­ing without having contact with or knowing their father. This has particularly affected poor people, single mothers and the vulnerable.

“The family,” said the Pope in Manila, “is today ridiculed and unjustly treated. Let us appreciate how beautiful, truthful and good it is to form a family.” It is here that he came out strongly in defence of mothers, “who today are not list­ened to and have little help to cope with daily life, while their central role in society is belittled”.

As usual Pope Francis illustrated his ideas with his own life experiences, often mentioning his grandma and parents. He said: “At home we were five siblings. While one did one thing, the other thought about another chore, and our povera mamma went from one side to another, but she was happy. She gave us so much. The mothers are the stongest antidote to eradicate individualism and egosim.”

Pope Francis adores children, as we see when he was surrounded by ‘street children’ in Manila or during audiences in St Peter’s Square.

“A child is a miracle which changes life. They are the unique fruit of love,” he said. Although he quotes experts as saying the “ideal are three children”, he also had encouraging words for large families: “In a world so often masked by egosim, the large family is a school of solidarity and sharing.”

After saying these words to a world where there is no place for children, he spoke on the issue of responsible parenthood. Once again he falls back on his experience: “This does not mean Christians should have serial children.” Some months ago in a parish he scolded a woman who became pregnant again after having seven Cesarean births: “Do you want to leave your seven children orphans. This is tempting God,” he told her. To clarify himself Pope Francis added: “We are not to breed children as if breeding rabbits.”

A baby sleeps as other family members watch live coverage of Pope Francis’s visit to Manila on January 16, 2015, in the coastal part of Tacloban, that was destroyed by Typhoon Haiyan. Photo: Reuters/Damir Sagolj

This reminded me when in the late 1950s we Maltese rightly felt insulted when British Labour minister

Aneurin Bevan said: “The Maltese breed like rabbits.” Among the very first voices to protest was the Cana Movement, which at the time was already teaching couples responsible parenthood through natural methods. I am glad to say that the Governor of the time, Sir Robert Laycock, supported us.

The Pope publicly affirmed that Catholics may have a responsibility in conscience to limit the size of their families

Maybe the Pope opened the subject of contraception in view of the coming debate at the synod. It is within this context that he touched upon Pope Paul VI’s controversial encylical Humanae Vitae, a matter also discussed in the synod.

Pope Francis praised Paul VI’s encylical when talking to the press, and reaffirmed the Church’s rejection of population control programmes as “idiological colonisation”, as the poorest of the world’s populations are constantly pressured by the rich West including international government orgaisations, to control their fertility in ways contrary to their traditions, dignity and belief. It is called ‘aid with strings’.

A girl embraces Pope Francis after a welcoming ceremony at the Malacanang Palace in Manila, the Philippines, on January 16, 2015. On right is Philippine President Benigno Aquino. Photo: Reuters/Ryeshen Egagamao

During his five days in Manila, the Pope publicly affirmed that Catholics may have a responsibility in conscience to limit the size of their families. He made strong references to the family in the context of a country where child poverty is endemic, and the need for govern­ment to provide family planning is very much needed. The Philippines’s population is 100 million, 86 per cent of which are Catholics. The bishops have fought a long battle against a government reproductive health Bill which passed in 2012.

The Pope’s final comment in Manila was about aging populations due to low birth rates. He said experts claimed that in 2024, Italy will have so many elderly citizens that it will not be able to fund its pensions. He said this was “an attempt to control humanity”.

Though the Pope did not touch upon the burning issue of remarried divorcees and their reception of the Eucharist, he was very open on the question of family parenthood. He was not deaf to the plight of the vast numbers of Catholics in Manila, and all over the world, who cannot afford children. In the Western world, the Pope’s ‘three children’ proposal is already not accessible for many.

From the very early days of the Cana Movement, in 1956, we advocated responsible parenthood and opened centres with doctors, counsellors and moralists to teach natural birth control methods.

We were blessed that Archbishop Michael Gonzi, (though not all the clergy), was open to our methods.

However, if the natural methods do not function, it seems Pope Francis is implying that if other methods are used, God’s mercy exceeds human frailty. His favourite theme is that the Church must show God’s love, mercy and pardon to those who fall short.

Mgr Charles Vella is founder of the Cana Movement and of marriage counselling centres in Italy.