Imagine ISIS deciding to attempt to attack Malta. What will their intentions be? Where will they hole themselves up?

Malta may not have the military expertise required but we are famed for our bargaining, so I am sure the Prime Minister and the leader of the Opposition will take the opportunity to make them lay down their arms and go back to where they came from.

But if negotiations fail and military use is the only option, our EU member colleagues will be more than willing to come to our aid (as laid down on becoming an EU member) and outgun the barbarians out of this island nation of Malta.