So it’s official: Jo-zeff is now the most popular politician on planet Earth. And... moreover, he is well on the way to becoming the most loved and lovable human being in the world. Already our affection for our charismatic and loveable leader transcends that for Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela and the Pope... all lumped together. Jo-zeff has made it into the hearts... and minds of all the great and good in the world... yes, the world.
We – here in Malta – have got ourselves a global superstar prime minister, leading us ever onwards, upwards and sideways into a brighter future for Malta... yesssssssssssss! Malta tagħna lkoll is now a worldwide aphorism – and all down to the charisma and loveable-ness of our own, our very own... Jo-zeff.
But on to other matters:
Now I’m sure you’ll join me in condemning the shrill carping in the Opposition gutter press about poor Kon’s recent need to take a part-time job. And I think I can say, on the behalf of all right-minded party supporters, that we are certain he will make an unqualified success of it.
It may seem a tad bizarre to some that he – as a government minister – should choose baby-sitting, but remember this: The poor lamb is married to a wife with very expensive tastes, and he would never be able to keep her in the manner to which she has become accustomed on just a minister’s salary. Plus the fact that she is also obliged to go out to work for a pittance, plus expenses.
My message to the Opposition media is: Pick on someone your own size... if you can find anyone tiny enough to adequately reflect your current miniscule representation in Parliament.
Still on the Opposition. I see recently they cooked up a new shadowy Cabinet. But because they’ve got so few MPs to choose from, they’ve had to supplement their numbers with Euro MPs. Lol!
At this point I feel it right to address an occurrence that recently caused me a great deal of embarrassment, even if it was for the most laudable of reasons. It concerns the unfortunate incident over my smartphone chancing to ring during a concert at the Manoel Theatre. Again, the Opposition media have made much of this, so I’m going to give you the true story.
I feel it right to address an occurrence that recently caused me a great deal of embarrassment
I had recently reprogrammed the mobile’s ring tone to be that of the Maltese national anthem... purely out of strong patriotic feelings for my country, you understand.
Unfortunately, despite being asked to switch off all phones – I personally never obey; I mean someone may want me urgently – mine rang shrilly during a rather soft slow section of a Debussy tone poem.
Well, how was I to know that it would cause the entire Malta Philharmonic Orchestra... plus nine-tenths of the audience, to jump to their feet and stand to rigid attention, until I managed to locate the damn phone and... take the call: and – in case you were wondering, yes it was important: a friend relaying the Juve v Roma result... very important. But rest assured it will not happen again; I’ve reprogrammed it to play the Red Flag instead.
I have had to momentarily pause writing this blog to check out the latest on the Opposition’s craven pursuit of yet another of Jo-zeff’s chosen lieutenants, poor old Joe Mizzi. Honestly; how they have the nerve to call poor old Joe incompetent is beyond me. A clear case of the pot calling the kettle black.
Who can forget the multifarious failings of their Austin? Who was both incompetent and... arrogant. At least Joe isn’t arrogant, whatever his other perceived failings may be.
But now I see he has cleverly hit on a way to at least deflect some of the flack away from himself. He seems to have appointed ‘Kennit’ as his chief whipping boy-cum-fall guy... and who can gainsay his judgement there. Prosit Joe... nice one.
Comments:
Naturally Nat writes:
The sheer arrogance of the man. He makes our Austin look almost pleasant.
Ta’ Lejbair writes:
All hail Jo-zeff, Is-Salvatur (Mark 2). Eat your hearts out nats.