We’ve all been there and done that: felt a hot tear trickling down our face to the notes of Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On (the shame, the shame), hummed to Pachelbel’s Canon in D, then gave an aged relative a new lease of life by taking her through the Macarena moves.

And that’s all good fun. However, it’s all a bit repetitive because when it comes to choosing the songs that will act as a backdrop to their ceremony, reception and first dance, couples tend to stick to tried and tested favourites.

Music sets the tone to your wedding. The operative word here is “your”. It is your day and you should celebrate it by choosing the music that brings back, and creates, beautiful memories.

The ceremony

Choosing music for your ceremony depends on the setting and the mood that you want to set when exchanging your vows.

If you’re a traditionalist – and have been humming your wedding song since you were in primary school – then go for time-honoured classics like ­Wagner’s Bridal Chorus, Mendelssohn’s Wedding March or instrumental classical pieces that your grandparents and parents got married to. However, keep in mind that modern alternatives can also set the right tone: cue Come Away With Me by Norah Jones and Where True Love Goes by Yusuf Islam.

Also, make sure that your wedding singer’s voice is suitable for the music of your choice because listening to your wedding singer butchering your favourite song will not be a good memory.

Don’t feel that you have to please everyone with your choice of music

The reception

You have more freedom to choose music for your reception. However, it’s not an anything goes situation.

First of all, you need to choose whether you will have a band, a soloist or a DJ at your wedding. This will, to some extent, dictate the choice of your reception music. Also, keep in mind the framework of your wedding’s style: if it’s a formal do, then choose soft, romantic and classical music, while if your wedding will be a high-energy affair, then turn up the volume and the beat.

Also, choose your songs together with your hired musicians. Just don’t give them the proverbial blank cheque and tell them to play whatever they want. After all, the soundtrack to your wedding reception should include songs that you love, rather than songs that the musicians enjoy playing.

Don’t feel that you have to please everyone with your choice of music. Remember that this is your wedding: choose songs that are meaningful to you and your partner.

That said, give due consideration to your guests. You might like 1980s music, for instance, but that doesn’t mean that you have to play your favourite hits of the decade from beginning to end: some of your guests might not like 1980s music.

And finally, take good care to choose songs which have the appropriate lyrics. Avoid songs that tell stories of broken romance and wedding day tragedies.

Music for the first dance

Now this is the most important song of the day, the one that will accompany you on your first dance with your partner.

This all depends on your personality. If you are a traditionalist, then your dance should be a show of good taste and grace: choose something like Unforgettable by Nat King Cole, Fly Me to the Moon by Frank Sinatra or At Last by Etta James.

If you’re both a traditionalist and a hopeless romantic, the ultimate song is Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers.

If you want to make a show out of your first dance and doa humorous routine, then there’s nothing better than Happy by Pharrell Williams or Start the Commotion by The Wiseguys. Alternatively, go for an old favourite such as Stuckin the Middle with You by Stealers Wheel.

Of course, the choice also depends on how good your dancing is. If you’ve only had a few lessons in the run-up to the wedding, then sway to a song that is familiar and easy to dance to. If you’re confident of your moves, then go for something a bit more difficult and contemporary. Robert Plant’s current hit Rainbow would be perfect. Not only does the song create a dreamy landscape, but the lyrics are just perfect: “And I will be a rainbow, while your storm is gone.” Now how beautiful is that?