OK, so having a bucket of cold water dumped over your head in August in Malta is a real heroic thing to do, especially when the PR-fluff piece that accompanies your derring-do doesn't tell people how much you donated anyway to the ALS Fund and, more importantly, how people can do it themselves.
Donate, I mean, not jump on the cheesy bandwagon that involves having cold water refresh you and being filmed doing it.
Just for the record, if anyone thinks that by nominating me, they will get me to act like a dork in front of a camera or dig into my pocket and make a donation, they can think again. I will act like a dork as and when I want to and I will donate as and when I want to, in the amount I want to and to whom I want.
In other words, don't bother, and the fact that politicians have been falling over themselves to get hip and down with the kids is enough of a sorry spectacle to put me off it, too.
But maybe that's just me.
Moving on, why hasn't Minister Evarist Bartolo resigned yet?
Because of his Government's foot-dragging, University and other students got their results late, adding to what is already quite an anxious time. And then he has the nerve to try and take the credit for sorting out things for them.
Because of his Government's general ineptitude, SkolaSajf started late and when it started, it rapidly became a shambles, witness the episode, single but symptomatic as it is, of that toddler being saved from roaring traffic by a passing salesman. No doubt an enquiry by some stooge or other will allow the minister to imitate a duck with water cascading off its back, as he has no concept of the buck stopping with him, clearly.
Because of Bartolo's astoundingly penny-pinching policies (maybe they were imposed on him by Simian Scicluna, to be fair) there is one teacher assigned to each class at SkolaSajf, meaning that when one kid wants to take a leak, they all have to troop off with the teacher, because the Ministry's lawyer has fired off a portentous missive warning teachers of their responsibility when it comes to leaving kids unattended.
The obvious solution, employing people to help out, doesn't seem to have occurred to Bartolo yet, who will probably come up with it by the end of summer.
When it comes to posing in front of cameras with racing cars or while agreements are signed, Bartolo will be there with the rest of them, and if the photo-op it involves lounging about like some lefty student discussing the state of the world, he'll be down to shirtsleeves faster than you can say Tony Blair.
But when it comes to actually doing something, well, here again, the dear fellow will revert to type, morphing into a lefty academic (or newspaper columnist of rodent-like characteristics) for whom action involves wondering when someone else is going to do something about it.