I was watching the Belgium vs USA game, when at half time, a man walking in a pristine unused kitchen with a decor screaming of Pippa Toledo came on telly. He told us viewers that he had sold his “other” flat and wanted to invest his money.

“Call me old-fashioned, but I want to save it for my daughter’s wedding,” he said. On cue, we get a close up of the grown-up daughter grumpily watching television - re-runs of Disney’s Cinderella one assumes.

Daddykins told us how he would be investing the money in a Mediterranean bank scheme bla di bla. Then he walked to the just-brought-in-from-the-showroom dining table where a lad pretended to be busy typing onto a lap top.

“I showed [the online bank investment scheme] it to my daughter’s boyfriend… so now I’m not the only one investing in her future”. Boyfriend looked up and gave him an ‘I-so-want-to-do-a-runner’ glance.

I think even in the 1950s adverts were not as 1950s as this. Can you imagine if it were the other way round? With the lad on the sofa, and the father saying: “I showed it to my son’s girlfriend, so now I’m not the only one investing in his future”, we would all have guffawed and cried: “Emasculated!” But portray a helpless female and no one bats an eyelid.

That’s because, sadly, culturally we are still more or less stuck in the macho phase. And it’s not the working class I’m referring to here, but it’s mostly the upper mid-section of society – those living in a reasonably well-off bubble.

The men sitting at the boardroom table (they must be men) all high-fived each other when they came up with the concept of this advert – because that is how they see their daughters.

“Let’s make sure she marries off a wealthy chap so I’ll have my mind at rest.” And that is why it never occurred to them to edit the script and say: “I’d like to invest in my daughter’s studies so she can follow her dream of becoming an oncologist/ pianist/Olympian.”

There is a sense of improvisation in watching the pairs awkwardly get ready to lock lips and engage in some pretty passionate embraces that make you wonder if some off-camera romance might have followed

Local adverts are really a mirror of what a sexist society we still are. That unfortunate Heritage Malta advert which was pulled off air last week was another example.

Its aim was to lure the masses to a prestigious exhibition at the National Museum of Archaeology. And they did so by having actors posing as two Roman noble men being massaged by subordinate women (erm, Roman men had male masseurs). Again another testosterone-fuelled advert aimed at the male audience.

Even commercially, this is a very stupid route. International studies show that women tend to be more influenced by television adverts than men. And if you notice carefully, most international adverts in normal unmacho countries target the female audiences.

This is because it is most likely the woman in the family who will say, ah there’s this exhibition at the museum, let’s go and see it, and statistically it is likely that it will be the lady in the house who will perk up her ears and google Mediterranean bank investment scheme.

But the sexism and target audiences are not the only problem with most of the local adverts. Most have no sense of the crucial importance for attention to detail.

There was one other Heritage Malta advert, in which a pretend Napoleon is swapping Panini cards with a pretend La Vallette.

The advert is filmed in a football ground and in the background there’s two dustbins framing the shot on each side. Is it possible that in the whole of Malta that was the only available backdrop?

This is in essence, Malta’s downfall: the anything-goes attitude, which promotes mediocrity. The devil is in the detail, but very few people uphold that. “U ijja, the dustbins barely show.” It’s like drinking a single malt whisky in a plastic cup instead of a crystal glass.

In any case, if you are one of those men at a round table and you have to come up with an advert concept, please check out a video ad which revolutionised the industry.

It’s called ‘First Kiss’, had a low budget of €800 (which included the video editor’s babysitting bill) and aimed at promoting a clothes label. The video begins with the 10 couples – complete strangers to each other. As the short film progresses, the couples kiss: a few of them passionately, some clumsily.

Within a couple of days, it went viral, within a week it hit a worldwide record of 40 million views online. The New York Times put it on its Business front cover, and asked if after this, brands will have to completely overhaul their media strategy.

What is it that made it resonate with millions of drive-by clickers? Well, there is a sense of improvisation in watching the pairs awkwardly get ready to lock lips and in some cases engage in some pretty passionate embraces that make you wonder if some off-camera romance might have followed.

It is simple, sweet and spontaneous. Most of all, it pulls at emotions. I think we need to leave behind the era of fake ads, or sexist ads, or amateurish ads. Companies need to come up with content we can connect with and story lines that reach our hearts. This is what makes a successful advert.

krischetcuti@gmail.com
Twitter: @Krischetcuti

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