Oh yessss! Yesss! Yesss! Is there no end to our charismatic and lovable (c & l) leader Jo-zeff’s triumphs? Not content with sweeping to power in last year’s watershed general election, he has now gone one better and battered the Opposition into oblivion with his – and our – total triumph in the elections for the European Parliament.
At the outset, Jo-zeff cleverly identified the poll as a direct contest between himself and... the Opposition’s guy (whose name escapes me). And what happened? Just like the result of a football match between Malta and one of the minnows of world footie, a landslide victory was the obvious outcome.
It makes you wonder what the so-called Opposition have been doing for the past year... very little, if you ask me.
Another, yes yet another great and glorious victory for Jo-zeff. So stick that up your jumpers – oh ye of little faith and other sundry doubters – we are here – and in Brussels – to stay, so there!
That unabashed triumph will certainly make my summer recess a happy one. As we broke for the hols I made it a point of wishing our c & l leader bon voyage, before he and Meeshell... plus their lovely ‘offsprings’ Moonbeam and Starshine jet off for a well-deserved freebie, courtesy of a grateful country and sundry turncoat benefactors, bless all their little brown noses.
My hols? Well, since you ask: I shall be spending some of the time with my shoulder to the wheel, meeting my constituents... whoever they may be – and effortlessly solving their intractable problems. The rest of the recess should be taken up with a cruise on a friend’s yacht. No names, but suffice it to say he is one of the multitude who saw sense before the last – and the EU – election(s) and changed his nautical livery from ultramarine to lobster.
Then what about all that fuss the so-called Opposition has been bleating about PBS now having a healthy bias of our supporters and friends in charge. He-llo! Haven’t you noticed, we are running the show now, which means we can do what we like... so there!
What statesmanship, what style, what foresight, what brass cheek. Only Jo-zeff could have pulled that off
When... no if... the Opposition ever get back in power I’m sure they will try to sneak in as many of their incompetent chums to PBS... But hey, no... I’m forgetting: they don’t even have enough remaining to run a tin-pot amateur radio station. So that’s alright then.
However, even though there don’t seem to be enough Opposition supporters left to form a football team, let alone mount a credible parliamentary Opposition, this does not seem to have stopped the remnants of their media taking an ineffectual pop at our c & l leader.
I am reliably informed that a recent article in their politically-polarised rag compared our dear Jo-zeff to “the unfortunate product of a liaison between Benito Mussolini and Mad Magazine’s Alfred E. Newman”. Rubbish! As everybody knows, he’s actually a dead ringer for a cross between Johnny Depp and Tom Cruise.
And before I leave the subject of the best-looking leader we have ever had: check out his latest cover photo on his Facebook page... a statesman incarnate, an example to all world leaders and a dead ringer for a slightly overweight Mao Tse Tung; prosit Jo-zeff.
And finally this month, I should like to applaud one of our c & l leader’s greatest ever triumphs. OK, I know it’s not new news, but I personally feel Jo-zeff’s incredible coup in demanding that the Chinese give us oodles of money for a few Enemalta crumbs, is quite possibly the finest bit of politicking since the almost-as-great Is-Salvatur formed the Corps Pijunieri. What statesmanship, what style, what foresight, what brass cheek. Only Jo-zeff could have pulled that off... and by golly he did!
Comments:
Dimmish Blue writes: “I feel a ‘Not in the interest of the people’ moment coming on.”
Scarlet O’Ha-ha writes: “Love the retor... er, ritor... er writing. Dom is indeed alive and well and residing in Burmarrad.”