I’m really not the bra-burning, militant feminist type, and I usually forget all about gender. As far as I’m concerned, we’re not ‘men’ or ‘women’, we’re people. Instead of making a big deal out of gender issues, I prefer to create my own opportunities, and to work towards my goals to the best of my abilities.
Too often, the familiar “I got a rough deal because I’m a woman” is used as an excuse for expecting handouts, preferential treatment, and so forth. However, every so often I receive a wake-up call, a reminder that certain gender issues remain relevant even today. One such wake-up call was the result of the world’s largest survey on violence against women, which was conducted by the EU Agency for Fundamental Rights.
One in three women are repeatedly harrassed, the survey informed us. The wake-up call was not even related to the figure – I do have a certain scepticism, that I like to think is healthy, towards statistics and surveys.
The wake-up call reached me as soon as I realised that the figure had utterly failed to shock me. One in three women, we are told, are repeatedly harassed, and my instant reaction is not that it’s horrible, or that we need to do something about it. No, my reaction is “yes, that sounds just about right”.
Women are so used to the reality of harassment, that minor forms of it do not even register on our scale of consciousness. It’s just one more thing that we expect life to throw at us on a daily basis and that we cope with. Move along, nothing to see here.
What’s worse is that, after a minute of reflection, I became convinced that the statistic is wrong. I’m pretty willing to bet that ALL women have, at some time in their lives, experienced repeated harassment.
I’m not talking worst case scenarios involving violence, of course. But we’ve all been through them - the lingering looks, the inappropriate remarks, the overly-familiar way that some men will adopt when addressing a woman... these are all common forms of harassment that we encounter, even when doing the simplest chores, such as shopping for groceries.
We just don’t raise a fuss about it, because if we did we’d be involved in some form of argument at least half a dozen times a day. Which brings me to today’s point – and no, it’s not Michelle Muscat’s ill-advised (albeit well-meaning, I’m sure) speech on Women’s Day.
Today’s point is a hurrah to Beyonce. You won’t often catch me hurrahing to Beyonce, but take a deep breath and chill. The hurrah has nothing to do with her music.
The celeb - as part of the campaign for female empowerment that is currently being run by the US Girl Scouts – has come out explaining why it’s not okay to casually throw about labels like ‘bossy’, ‘pushy’ or ‘stubborn’ just because you have a problem with assertive women.
And while I don’t necessarily hail Beyonce as the last bastion for female dignity – songs like Single Ladies and Naughty Girl make me cringe even just for the fact that I know about them – in this case she wins my respect.
At first read, the whole campaign sounds a bit much. Ban ‘bossy’? The word ‘bossy’ isn’t exactly the worst of insults, right? However, it does foster a decidely negative attitude towards women who know what they want and who won’t stand for any bull. Just think about it: when was the last time you heard it being used to describe an assertive man?
Exactly.
So yeah, it’s about time that we – and this ‘we’ includes both men AND women, as you’d be surprised at the way women can be their own worst enemies – stop the labelling. After all, no-one complains about ‘bossy’ when ‘bossy’ gets the job done.
Read more about the campaign here: http://banbossy.com/