Those of you whose memory extends further back than today’s breakfast will recall that, on February 15 last, in this very column, in a manner that would have had I. M. Beck being proud of me, I had written that “... there’s quite a groundswell in favour of [a woman] being appointed as the nation’s figurehead, with Marie-Louise Coleiro Preca being mentioned more and more. Rumour has it that the Prime Minister wouldn’t be weeping and wailing and gnashing his teeth at the prospect of her not being in Cabinet but, as I said, this is only rumour, that scatty and misleading beast.”

Now if only I could apply my powers of prescience to divining which numbers the lottery-computer was going to churn out, I’d be a sight better off than I am.

Still, there’s something to be said for the warm glow you feel when you get it right, although it would have been nice if the ladies and gentlemen of the press were to have admitted that I had scooped them.

I wasn’t holding my breath waiting, of course.

Other writers have bandied about various theories as to why the Prime Minister’s fond gaze fell upon Coleiro Preca for the job: her nomination was certainly not calculated to contribute to enhancing the Labour Party’s pre-election sloganeering about national unity and such-like beautiful sentiments. She’s out of the Prime Minister’s hair with her less than progressive liberal outlook on life, that’s for sure, and he’s not going to need to look over his shoulder all the time at her massive support at the grass roots.

It is to be hoped that Coleiro Preca will rise to the role and carry out the duties of her office in the same way her predecessors did, without exception. I didn’t mean that to sound patronising.

That said, did I miss a memo at some point? I ask because it was reported that while addressing a news conference at Auberge de Castille, when he announced the nomination, Joseph Muscat said the appointment was a very important one as it would lay the foundations for the Second Republic.

Excuse me? Second Republic? I hazily recall some twaddle about this in the throes of the election campaign but, come on, seriously? Do we need a Second Republic? Why, to get another blinking public holiday added to the list of national days we already have?

The report went on to say that the Prime Minister said her nomination was necessary as, at this point in time, the country needed a head of state in his (presumably “her” was meant) prime and not close to retirement and, moreover, the next president was to be in charge of constitutional amendments.

Leaving aside the snide dig at the current President, who is hardly in his dotage, for heaven’s sake, what is this about the next president being in charge of constitutional amendments?

Read my lips, Prime Minister, the President of the Republic is basically a figurehead, with no executive or other powers except for the residual powers the Constitution contemplates, which, anyway, are proscribed by the relevant conventions. She is not empowered to be in charge of constitutional amendments, that is the function of our elected politicians and the fact that the nominee was an elected politician, a handsomely elected one, to boot, is irrelevant.

The Prime Minister went on to say that “the new president will still be in charge of the national strategy against poverty. She will also be in charge of the food aid programme, the national family commission and the national prevention agency, among other functions”.

What is this about the next president being in charge of constitutional amendments?

Fine words, indeed, but they have no basis in law and the Prime Minister has no business swanning in and messing about with the Constitution. Not that there’s anything intrinsically wrong with the tasks that have been given to the president-designate, far from it, but who’s to say that some Prime Minister in the future wouldn’t be tempted to assign control over the army and catering corps to the president? Where would that leave us?

The Prime Minister was quoted as saying that “this will be a watershed point and a gift on the occasion of the 50th anniversary of independence”.

Again, come on, seriously, is Coleiro Preca a “gift” and “a watershed point”? What the hack (to quote the Prime Minister again) is this, just another effort to prove to all of us that there is no respect for the meaning of words inherent in anything this bunch say?

It’s not as if we were waiting with bated breath for the appointment of a diehard Labour politician of the old school to the highest office in the land, so why is she being wrapped up in gift-wrapping?

None other than Wenzu Mintoff, something of a grey eminence in Labour’s intelligentsia, has come up with the idea that Kate Gonzi should be appointed Acting President when Coleiro Preca is away from the country, saying that they would make a fine tandem.

I’m sure he didn’t mean that they would be a bicycle made for two, if you’ll forgive the mild lèse majesté, but since when has the Acting President been anything other than a place-holder for a figurehead, of even less legal significance than the president herself? And I mean this without any disrespect for the people who are asked to do the job.

It really does strike me that these people have no grasp of what living in a constitutionally-sanctioned environment means.

Going off at a tangent, as one does, what it is about Henley & Who’s’em, that they think they run the country?

The impression they’re giving is that they have this Prime Minister-given right to flog our passports any which way they like and despite what the European Commission may think the rules are. I have no idea why the Commission backed out of contesting Muscat’s cunning plan to raise some dosh, because if they look at Henley & Who’s’em marketing ploys, they should be coming to the conclusion that they were sold a young pooch because, in essence, nothing much has changed, at least not in principle.

Anyone who says this isn’t the case is either moderately myopic or a Labour weasel because all that’s changed is the price, now in the region of a cool million, which remains peanuts for Henley & Thingy’s target market.

Yeah, fine, there needs to be some sort of residence qualification but look at the nuts and bolts of it and we’re still looking at form over substance; we’re in Schengen, so who’s going to know if our new compatriots have lived here or not, really?

It’s shameful that the government is being allowed to get away with this just because no one has the energy or the critical faculties to get to the nub of the matter and shine a spotlight on the real deal.

And then, to cap it all, Muscat and his minions spout balderdash about the Nationalists trying to scare off foreign investment, as if they weren’t doing a great job all on their own.

We had the pleasure, last Tuesday, of having dinner at Rubino’s in town, where I hadn’t been for some time. Leaving aside the fact that the rowdier end of the table managed to justify the cover charge twice (I’m not entirely sure there is a cover charge, but there should have been one just for us) and we were also treated to a fine example of late-evening plate dropping by our host, the food was simply great, as was the service, but it always is when the Diaconos do their thing.

imbocca@gmail.com

http://www.timesofmalta.com/articles/author/20