Spiritual guide Gordon Vassallo offers advice on the best way to incorporate a sense of the religious in the lives of young children today.
Raising children is a tough job. It has always been so. But in the midst of today’s realities where our children are immersed in the complexity of conflicting messages brought about by social media, computer games and an era of hyper- sexualisation, parenting has become not only hard but a risky business.
To add to this density of an ultra-modern pluralistic social culture, ethics and values seem to be mellowed down and substituted with ideologies that only seek to satisfy the immediate cravings of passion.
We all know that parents excel in taking care of the physical and academic needs of their children. But, when it comes to their spiritual needs, we often fail miserably.
In the absence of a strong faith foundation laid by their parents, teens may end up dwelling in illusive and destructive life patterns
Perhaps, our instant defence mechanism as parents conveniently pushes us to shift the responsibility of spiritual formation of our loved ones on the Church leaders and their programmes. But, although the latter are doing a great job, they should only serve to supplement and reinforce what children should be learning at home all the time from their parents.
Parents are the ones who interact on a daily basis with their young ones, and they are the ones who are primarily endowed to develop within the child a spiritual worldview. With full respect to parents who harbour other faith convictions, we shall limit our discussion to the local context, where most of us claim to harbour the Christian faith.
Parents may claim that spiritual parenting is beyond them for “they cannot give away something they don’t have”. But sometimes this is nothing but a convenient excuse.
Spiritual parenting does not expect parents to be exceedingly religious or to dish out a quick fix answer to all the inquisitive questions and curiosities of their young ones. The essence lies in being with the children as they struggle with their life issues, in encouraging and embedding hope and in leading them in the divine path through the unfading truths of the Gospels.
Many life transitions occur during the teen years. In the absence of a strong faith foundation laid by their parents, teens may end up dwelling in illusive and destructive life patterns.
Tips for spiritual parenting
Lead by example. The parents’ role in daily decision-making for a healthy and balanced lifestyle within an ethical framework will strongly influence your young ones.
Expose your children to the moral framework of the Bible as they go through their life issues. It is much better than the polluted rivers that often spill out through subtle and destructive social media.
Create space for God and for them. As parents create space for God in their daily lives, through moments of silence and reflection, through moments of spontaneous prayer and thanksgiving, God will shower parents with the wisdom needed to guide their loved ones into his paths.
Engage in a daily devotion easily accessible through sites like Sacred Space and many others. Your daily devotions will be springboards to life-directing conversations which will not only be cherished by your children but by your own self.
Cultivate an environment for your children’s faith to grow. Encourage personal prayer and active participation in communal faith fellowships.
Nurture your children’s gifts and talents by allowing them to express their spirituality through music, art, sports and other disciplines which manifest God’s gift of co-creativity.
Remember that the commands of God are taught best in the normal flow of life. Jesus’ ministry on earth took place in everyday.
As he encountered people on the roadside, in the marketplace or on a tree, he taught them the truth in the context of their life experience. Jesus recognised the effectiveness of applying the truth to everyday life. Can you?