The cancer survivor holds up a copy of his book. Photo: Chris Sant Fournier

A testicular cancer survivor has written a novel inspired by his experience to raise awareness about the disease that left him psychologically shattered and feeling “inferior to other men”.

Being diagnosed with cancer and removing his right testicle, while keeping it a secret from most of his family and friends, gave the man the urge to speak up and raise awareness.

But the fact that some loved ones are still in the dark, coupled with the shame of having lost a testicle, led him to decide to write the book using the nom de plume R. Itchy Knob Flodna – a hint of the humorous streak that runs through the novel.

The book, The Monster Between My Legs, tells the story of a porn star who is diagnosed with testicular cancer and, when faced with the fear of death, tries to rectify past wrongs. Although the author is Maltese, it is set in the UK.

Having testicular cancer is clearly not funny, but the author believes that some humour is healthy and can help drive the message home.

The hardest part of recovery is the psychological part

“All cancer stories, rightly so, are sad stories. But the worse thing we can do is take ourselves too seriously all the time. Once you get over the sad part, life will start getting better again. For me, looking back, I was lucky that it was detected early and that it did not spread.

“It’s important in life to dust yourself down after you fall, get on with it and try to look for the positive,” the 42-year-old author said.

He is very much aware that testicular cancer is no laughing matter and that “it really is a monster inside you”.

Those moments when he feared he would die, and worried about his family, are still clearly etched in his memory.

Four years have passed since he was diagnosed. He was having a shower when he noticed his right testicle was swollen. His doctor initially put him on antibiotics thinking it might be an infection.

But when the swelling did not subside, he was advised to get a scan – which revealed it was cancer that had to be operated upon.

He only told his wife and a few close friends about the ordeal. Most of his family is still unaware and now that time has passed, it is even harder to tell them.

“The hardest part of recovery is the psychological part… suddenly you feel you are not like everyone else. Although rationally it does not make sense to feel that way, you still feel you lost something and are no longer a man,” he said.

Two years ago he decided to write the book. Writing helped him deal with the pain, he said, adding he would not have made it without the support of his wife.

“Four years ago I was indifferent to people with cancer. And that’s something I should be ashamed of.

“But I think it’s true of many people… it’s important to create awareness and let people know that, in the end, you’re not alone… because that was my biggest concern,” he said.

The novel can be found in local book shops and can be bought online on Amazon and eBay. The author plans to donate any money raised to the Hospice Movement or Puttinu Cares Foundation.

Testicular cancer

In Malta, testicular cancer is diagnosed in four out of every 100,000 men, which means consultants diagnose approximately 20 new cases per year. It is very treatable if detected early.

Signs of testicular cancer include pain and heaviness in the testicles, testicular swelling and surface irregularity.

Other occasional symptoms are breast enlargement and pain due to female sex hormones produced by the tumour. The presence of back pain may indicate spread of cancer into the abdomen.