I’m at the great age where, if I am given a massage, I have to pay for it. And any extras or happy endings are definitely not due to my biceps, beauty or bearing. Only my wallet could be the attraction.

So what am I on about besides age and its withering passage? I never thought a country like ours—with its mores and uprightness—could have so many massage parlours all run by exotic-sounding Asian belles.

Now I have no problem at all with the oldest profession and the pros behind it. I think women—just as men—should be free to trade their body at whatever time they desire. After all politicians do it and anyway I’m never sure which is the older profession.

To me women of loose morals—those who offer their sex for money—can also advertise their trade blatantly as long as the young or infirm are not involved. The important thing is that it is obvious what they are advertising to avoid conning whoever requests their services.

Now let me get this straight before I’m hauled in front of a Catholic tribunal or Inquisition (or my wife gives me a bit of a talking to), I have not been conned or stripped of a few coins by anyone. I have just reached this conclusion after a few instances when the police arraigned and accused owners of massage parlours as actually not being there for muscle relaxation but for naughty services. Yes, the parlours—or some of them—are synonyms for brothels, where, ahem, prostitutes ply their lascivious trades.

So if a real physiotherapist or masseuse decides to set up shop here (especially if she is Asian) she’s immediately considered a doer of evil stuff and a woman of no morals.

When I was young, prostitution was quite rife but it was mainly restricted to a particular street in Gżira and to part of Strait Street. Everyone who went there knew what to expect and find and, even if not legal, it was confined to an area known for its nefarious goings-on. Today even sedate Balzan and sleepy Għargħur have their own peculiar and shady outlets and the Sliema street I live in actually boasts a club for exotic dancers. Nothing wrong with that: but nothing good either.

If the law needs amending get on with it Mr Minister. Let us all have it plain and clear where women are offering a few fringe benefits together with a massage. I have no problem at all if women sell, lease, or give their body to the highest or lowest bidder. But let us, poor innocent mortals, know who they are and where they are situated, if possible as far away from habitation as possible.