This man Joseph is definitely going to pull us out of our doldrums. He rocks. No, I’ll rephrase that—he super-rocks. He loves everyone like a modern hippy. He’s going to solve our deficit, save our crumbling economy and, together with his trusted friend Super-Kon, he’s going to clean our air, halve all cancer causes, and get us to save money on all our bills. Income tax is on the way down and our life is on the way to unbelievable wealth, health and comfort. And while they are at it these Marvel Super Heroes are going to get Arriva to work, waiting lists to disappear and stipends and all the rest to remain the same or better.

The latest offer to our land is a tablet each to all our Form 4 students. The Lord and Moses be praised. Manna is definitely raining down on us.

Now I know pigs and bulls fly quite often on this land of wonder but we should still be very careful as the natural thing for these flying pigs and especially bulls is to let out a few pats which could cover us all with what is sometimes euphemistically called manure.

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