Adoption IS in a child’s best interest
Whenever a child is adopted from all over the civilised world, the best interest of the child is always given utmost importance.
When potential adoptive parents apply to adopt a child they are put under huge scrutiny. Their personal backgrounds, their relationship, their financial situation is put under the spot light. They also have to get references to support their parenting competence, and they have to attend a six week course to get them prepared. They also pay through their teeth and have to wait and wait until they’re finally matched with a child.
So when political parties, on the eve on an election, come out and say that they are not against gay couples adopting so long as it’s in the best interest of the child I applaud them and then, throw up a little bit in my mouth.
Adoptions are ALWAYS done in the best interest of the child so please stop this verbal vomit.
Thing is this, what’s in the child’s best interest can be very subjective. What if whoever is deciding is of the opinion that having same sex parents is not in the best interest of any child? Who’s to stop him or her from stopping such adoptions on other ‘fake’ premises?
Unlike Lawrence Gonzi whose arm had to be twisted into agreement, Joseph Muscat seemed very determined and convinced when talking about the matter in Gozo. This and this alone makes me trust him a tad more on the matter, but he then told Malta Today that “legislation on gay parents' adoption was not on his legislative agenda."
Unless he’s being misquoted this means that he is not going to do anything in the five years that he will be in government to change the law in a way which would allow gay couples to adopt. If he doesn’t change or try to change the law, then, all this is, is a personal opinion. A bit like saying that he prefers prunes to apples.
Perhaps his intention is to have this matter dealt with in the legislation on Civil Unions by having Civil Unions only different to marriage in name.
This would be different from the Civil Partnership as proposed by the Nationalist Government as part of the Cohabitation Law.
But we don’t know this do we?
Whichever way it goes, Muscat would still have to propose Civil Union legislation in parliament and if he includes gay adoptions within it, it stands a lesser chance of making it through.
It could then go either way, or it could go nowhere. God forbid, it could end up in a referendum which just like other minority issues would be wrong wrong wrong.
So whilst I’m sick to my stomach and bored out of my wits hearing about gas lines, and gas pipes and all the energy hullabaloo that no one can make head or tails of, I would much rather have both parties grilled and drilled about the ins and outs of Civil Unions and adoptions.
I mean let’s face it, did we grill the Nationalist party about their transport reform?
Did we grill them about their plans for the Parliament/theatre building?
Did we grill them about Smart City?
No we didn’t, and though all of these ended pretty badly, financially we’re still afloat.
On the other hand, people suffering social injustices, such as gay couples who find themselves on the streets when their long term partner passes away, are still suffering.
I didn’t think I’d ever say this, but sometimes financial stability does not make everything better.
Sometimes, it makes no difference whatsoever!
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Jonathan McBee
Jan 21st, 21:28
All political agendas aside, as has been mentioned before, you really should have included AD in this argument. I know through experience with people involved in the party that they were the first to start thinking of these issues, when the two bigger parties wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole, as it would cost them votes.
Matthew Farrugia
Jan 20th, 11:15
There are a lot of children dying from hunger, left alone without nobody to take care of them. I'm sure they will be much better if they were adopted by a gay couple than left there to live their miserable life
Maria Borg
Jan 23rd, 17:42
Mr Farrugia
"There are a lot of children dying from hunger, left alone without nobody to take care of them."
Everything is better than dying from hunger so according to your argument we might as well let pedophiles adopt children too. But this is NOT how things are done, read Bezzina's 2nd paragraph.
Mr E Phillips
Jan 24th, 21:53
Maria Borg,
Fantastic reasoning Maria. As far as I know paedophilia is illegal, homosexuality not so.
Maria Borg
Jan 25th, 17:55
@ Mr E Philips,
For your information Mr Philips, adoption by a same sex couple is illegal TOO but Mr Farrugia argued that this should not continue to be illegal because a gay couple can offer to the child something better than dying from hunger. My argument was that pedophiles can do the same, infact virtually everyone could offer the child something better than dying from hunger.
Mr E Phillips
Jan 25th, 23:08
Maria Borg,
Yes, but there is no logical reason for it to be so. Paedophiles are universally acknowledged as being criminal, homosexuals are not. Paedophilia is illegal whether practised as an individual or as a couple and rightly so. Explain please why 2 homosexuals in a committed relationship are, by law, less desirable as parents as a single homosexual?
Mr E Phillips
Jan 25th, 23:08
Maria Borg,
Yes, but there is no logical reason for it to be so. Paedophiles are universally acknowledged as being criminal, homosexuals are not. Paedophilia is illegal whether practised as an individual or as a couple and rightly so. Explain please why 2 homosexuals in a committed relationship are, by law, less desirable as parents as a single homosexual?
Maria Borg
Jan 26th, 19:25
Mr E Phillips
"Explain please why 2 homosexuals in a committed relationship are, by law, less desirable as parents as a single homosexual?"
I did not attack the belief that two homosexuals can be good parents just like heterosexuals. I was "attacking" the argument put forward by Mr Farrugia to convince us to let homosexuals adopt children.
Matthew Farrugia
Jan 20th, 11:09
In my opinion I see no reason why gay couples cannot adopt children. I'm sure they can be much better parents than some normal couples. Who says that they can be influenced to turn out gay when they grow up makes no sense to me. If this was the case then there would be no gay people because they are all born from a normal couple. To be gay is not a choice you make. You are born like that.
Maria Borg
Jan 21st, 21:21
"If this was the case then there would be no gay people because they are all born from a normal couple. "
Wrong. Some homosexuals have one or two homosexual parents. For your information homosexuals have children too sometimes, elton john already have two and there are many homosexuals in malta who decide to get married and have children.
Andy Farrugia
Jan 19th, 12:25
Back to your pet hates, aren't you? Cretinous to the nth degree!
Francis Raeymaekers
Jan 18th, 17:06
Alison: You'd get my vote if I had one! Prosit!
Andre` Vella
Jan 18th, 15:20
Alison don't mention AD in your articles, God forbid your analysis will be inclusive of all political parties.
Nahseb qed tara wisq Net u Supa-1.
Francis Saliba M.D.
Jan 18th, 12:57
Adoptions SHOULD always be in the child's best necessary but it does not follow that all adoptions by any aspiring adopting parents would actually turn out to be in the child's interest unless precautions are taken and obvious risks avoided. In the Paris anti-gay marriage protest there were even gays who joined the protest because they conceded that rights of children trumped their wishes as gay
Mr E Phillips
Jan 18th, 21:25
Francis,
So you would agree that those who believe religious indoctrination is wrong are correct in saying that religious people shouldn't be able to adopt children? Or you're definition of risk is only attributed to those who believe different things to you?
L Zerafa
Jan 19th, 13:27
And there are also many straight people at gay pride parades, tabib.
Francis Saliba M.D.
Jan 19th, 15:59
@E Phillips
Please do not take liberties by assuming that I have beliefs that I do not have. Children being taught maths, languages and religion in accordance with the wishes of their legal guardians are not being indoctrinated at all - they are being cared for lovingly. Those who believe differently should start to think reasonably.
Francis Saliba M.D.
Jan 19th, 16:03
@L Zerafa
So what? That is no ground to believe that they approve adoptions by gays. But in the Paris demonstrations the gays were there to oppose gay marriage and adoption - they said as much to correspondents.
Mr E Phillips
Jan 19th, 17:39
Francis,
In the context of the discussion it's a fairly safe assumption? Don't be equating learning maths and languages with religion. The first two are standardised,universally beneficial and based on facts the latter is not.
Brainwashing children into believing in god, and all that goes with it, before they are old enough to know any better is indeed indoctrination.
Mr E Phillips
Jan 19th, 17:43
cont - Francis,
How long do you think your religion, or any other, would last if religion was taught only when children reached
an age when they could fully comprehend what it was about.
There's a reason for getting them young right?
Francis Saliba M.D.
Jan 19th, 21:16
@E Phillips
Where you are concerned it is not all safe to let you assume anything. Religion is as much part of the curriculum as maths and languages. Your personal antipathy towards religion does not alter that fact for other parents wanting to educate their children. Educating according to the intention of the legal guardian is not brainwashing except to the blinkered.
Alex Ellul
Jan 18th, 11:48
"......and they have to attend a six week course to get them prepared."
What if the course leader objects to lecture a gay couple on parenting due to his personal beliefs? This happened in the UK where the objector got sacked. Furthermore a married couple (man and woman I mean) who applied for adoption were refused because they declared that they were Christians and therefore against gay marriage
J Farrugia
Jan 18th, 11:03
It comes down to one simple thing, giving the KID a loving home or leaving them in wilderness for the rest of their lives, i'm sure no kid would give a flying monkeys who and what their potential parents are as long as their is love and a warm home.
Mr Joseph Carmel Chetcuti
Jan 18th, 00:45
Three things need to be done. First, revisit the legislation to ensure that gay men and lesbians are not discriminated against, as individuals and as couples. I emphasize that this is not about my rights as a gay man but about the best interests of the child. Second, revisit and rewrite policy. Thirdly appoint people who are not homophobes or religious freaks.
Mr Joseph Carmel Chetcuti
Jan 18th, 00:43
Alision, adoption is not a matter for a referendum. There is international law to consider. The best interests of the child are paramount, not the maintenance of traditional families.
Vanessa Mifsud
Jan 18th, 17:24
Joseph, now the question is.. WHAT do they mean by the best interest of the Child? I am positive these words will be twisted by either party that is elected in Gov't. Let's wait and see & finger crossed.
Frank Zammit
Jan 17th, 23:32
(2) There is scientific proof that the situation at home between an homosexual couple and a lesbian couple is sufficiently different that it can be noted and documented. Lets look at the situation from a different angle. Baby to be adopted. Evaluation finds that a homosexual couple, a heterosexual couple and a lesbian couple are equally suited to adopt. To which couple will you give your child?
V. DeBono
Jan 18th, 10:52
definitely not to your family....I dint even think people like you existed anymore..... Maaa x'biza
Frank Zammit
Jan 18th, 18:59
I am not against GAYS OR LESBIANS . I agree that there should be laws to protect against discrimination. Let them get married if they so wish, but when it comes to adopting there is no way on earth that I can be convinced that this is beneficial.. I have seen the result of it first hand and they suffer psychologically.It's not fair to adopt a child who cannot chose just to satisfy a selfish need.
Alison Bezzina
Jan 19th, 11:34
Frank, I personally have my doubts about your first hand experience, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt because no one and not group or minority are perfect....but have you never seen straight couples totally messing up their kids ?
Should we stop straight couples adopting or having children, because of a few bad apples ?
Should we close down all Church orphanages too ?
Frank Zammit
Jan 17th, 22:45
(1) What is it with you people? Common sense suggests that a heterosexual couple is superior to a GAY couple; Why? A heterosexual couple can reproduce, a gay couple can't . There is a reason for this its called NATURE and NATURE took millions of years to evolve to this point. Are you people now claiming that you are superior to NATURE or maybe that Nature has got it all wrong?
Alison Bezzina
Jan 18th, 10:27
Nature also allows a 12 year old girl to reproduce. How superior is that ?
It also allows a 60 year old man to impregnate a teenager against her will. How superior is that?
Sometimes nature makes it impossilbe for what you'd define a perfect hetreosexual couple to have children. How superior is that?
And should we not use incubators to save premature babies? It is after all unnatural.
Ms. P.M Graham
Jan 18th, 10:39
and there I believe is the crux of this whole debate.
"Common sense suggests that a heterosexual couple is superior to a GAY couple; "
and it is attitudes like this, fed to the young child, that causes much of the talked about bullying .......... which I hasten to add I have no personal experience of.
Frank Zammit
Jan 18th, 18:38
Sex with under aged people and rape can never be condoned. Really don't know what your point is here since mentally sick people exist in the Gay world as much as they exist in the heterosexual world. As regards putting a baby in an incubator? Again what is your point? What does advancement in medicine has got to do with it? Heterosexual couple not able to conceive-help available. Gay couple - NO
Mario Grech
Jan 19th, 15:12
The point is pretty clear to me Frank. Let me try to explain to you ..... you suggest that since it is 'unnatural' for a gay couple to conceive and because this is NATURE and NATURE took millions of years to evolve then it must be right. Alison explains how nature can sometimes be wrong because it does't take social situations into consideration. As for the incubator...all medicine is 'unnatural'
r borg
Jan 21st, 14:33
@alison... nature does not give a hoot about cultures and social normities, nature has one goal in mind...survival of the species. Nature made a 12 yr old conceive for that reason whether you like it or not. One cannot blame nature just because it does not fit your projected lifestyle. For nature a 12 year old getting pregnant is nothing out of the ordinary for our society its not.
Sarah Grech (Zebbug)
Jan 17th, 20:49
How naive...
Ken Cowan
Jan 17th, 22:56
WHY is it "naive"? Or are you so infallible that you don't even have to explain yourself?
Eddy Privitera
Jan 17th, 20:23
Allison: I'll just take up one point you mentiioned : " gay couples who find themselves on the street when their long term partners passes away ". I heard Dr. Muscat specifically mention this example you mentioned. He made it plain that he wants to stop this cruelty !
Ms. P.M Graham
Jan 17th, 21:21
debatable I know :) but being of sound mind and body my partner and the children are well taken care of by my will that took less than an hour to complete.
Eddy Privitera
Jan 18th, 09:25
Ms. GRaham: I agree with you up to a point. One can't write down in a will, that your partner has the right to continue living in the same residence if this was rented to you and is in your name only !
Ms. P.M Graham
Jan 17th, 20:01
Unless the laws on freeing children for adoption are changed it really doesn't matter whether Gays can adopt or not, unless of course it's the principle as opposed to the child that takes center stage. Right now there are no children to adopt in Malta, or very few, because adoption requires the parents consent.
Karl Consiglio
Jan 17th, 19:40
Psychologically their prime interest would be their real parents, or at least one of them, of course here we are assuming when that aint possible.
Vanessa Mifsud
Jan 17th, 23:13
Karl, how can their prime interest be their biological parents when for one reason or another, they put them up for adoption.
Victor Rodenas
Jan 17th, 19:05
To get votes, sometimes we dismiss what our conscience tells us.
Mario Scicluna
Jan 18th, 10:18
Se nergaw nibdew il-kantaliena tal-'kuxjenza'? Mela meta jkun konvenjenti ndeffsu l-kuxjenza biss? Allura min jaqbel m'ghandux kuxjenza? Victor, issa jekk ma jimpurtax, bir-rispett kollhu naturalment, x'tifhem int meta ssemmi kuxjenza int?
U haga ohra Victor, min imexxi irid jisma lil poplu dwar drittijiet civili, u jwettaqhom mhux b'konvenjenza, imma b'konvinzjoni jekk irid ikun kredibbli!
Mario Scicluna
Jan 18th, 11:55
Se nergaw nibdew il-kantaliena tal-'kuxjenza'? Mela meta jkun konvenjenti ndeffsu l-kuxjenza biss? Allura min jaqbel m'ghandux kuxjenza? Victor, issa jekk ma jimpurtax, bir-rispett kollhu naturalment, x'tifhem int meta ssemmi kuxjenza int?
U haga ohra Victor, min imexxi irid jisma lil poplu dwar drittijiet civili, u jwettaqhom mhux b'konvenjenza, imma b'konvinzjoni jekk irid ikun kredibbli!
Ethelbert Schembri
Jan 17th, 17:18
Our country's financial situation can go find a hole and hide in it if our dignity is messed up. Ones dignity is everything, one can be the poorest of all people but if this person have dignity s/he have everything s/he needs.
The govt should always make sure to work that every citizen it represents have dignity, the chalange is that it very much varies depending on who you are and your thoughts.
Please choose the reason of your report below: