‘I was determined not to leave this commitment’
Love, forgiveness and kisses led to couple’s 70th anniversary
Video: Paul Spiteri Lucas
Chocolates used to mysteriously appear in the jacket pocket of Major Carmel D’Anastasi when he was a young sergeant based at Fort St Elmo in Valletta in the late 1930s.
He later learnt that the tasty treats were secretly placed there by a young girl who often passed in front of the fort on her way to school.
That young girl, called Mary, became his wife seven decades ago as the couple celebrated their 70th anniversary last Thursday.
“When I used to go out to the nearby shop, wearing my uniform, I’d remove my jacket. When I returned to the fort by 9.30pm I would find a piece of chocolate in my jacket… it took me a while to realise who was doing it,” says Major D’Anastasi who turns 94 on Friday.
Sitting beside him at Villa Messina retirement home in Rabat, his wife recalls how, throughout their marriage, she retained her trademark secret gesture and slipped chocolates in his jackets or drawers.
Ms D’Anastasi, who turned 87 last Tuesday, was only 11 years old when she first saw her darling Danny, as he is known by friends.
As a member of the Royal Malta Artillery he was based on one of the canons of the fort, located across the road from her house. Whenever she passed in front of him, with her school friends, she waved.
“She noticed me first since I had another girlfriend at the time,” he teases, adding that he eventually chose her.
When she was about to turn 17 he plucked up the courage to ask her father for her hand in marriage.
“Her father initially said he did not have any children who were old enough to marry… But I later learnt he got married to her mother when she was 16,” he says.
The couple tied the knot at the old parish church of Santa Venera on January 3, 1943 – two days after her 17th birthday and a few days before he turned 24.
“I know I was barely 17 and my parents did not like the fact I was marrying so young. But nothing gets in the way of love,” Mrs D’Anastasi says.
The young lovebirds did not waste time in starting a family and, that October, Ms D’Anastasi gave birth to the first of five children. Today they have 11 grandchildren and one great-grandchild.
Major D’Anastasi continued serving in the army for 37 years and the memories of the early days are still very vivid in his memory.
He proudly wears military badges that included a badge issued by the English Ministry of Defence to all veterans and the RMA badge.
On his left ring finger he wears a “badge” that marks another form of loyalty – one that is mirrored on his wife’s left hand.
“Our relationship was perfect. You need to be prepared and committed… I was determined that, once I entered this commitment, I would not leave. I’m seven years older than her so it’s my job to look after her, and I’m still doing so,” he says affectionately before adding: “And she cooks really well.”
His wife quickly adds: “I love him and never wanted anyone else. I used to be jealous of him but now he proved he will stay with me so I’m not so jealous anymore.”
Like all couples they had their arguments. “But in the evening we kissed each other and forgot whatever happened during the day,” he says, demonstrating the action by planting a kiss on his wife’s cheek.
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Bernadette nee Buttigieg
Jan 8th, 18:03
Major & Mrs D'Anastasi, congratulations on celebrating your Platinum wedding anniversary. I met you in the '70s when I attended St Joseph's School, Blata-l-Bajda with your daughter Anna. I am the youngest child of the late Capt Joseph S. & Mrs Mary Buttigieg of Valletta, both of whom you knew well as my daddy too served at Fort St Elmo during WWII. Best wishes & God bless from Melbourne Australia.
John Cundy
Jan 7th, 11:56
What a wonderful story! Very heart-warming. My best wishes to you both.
M Rayner
Jan 7th, 08:32
Congratulations Mr.&Mrs D'Anastasi, I was lucky to meet Major D'Anastasi a couple of times, through one of his sons,he enjoys recounting memories of the past (his good old days), God bless you both. Mario
Anthony Paul Naudi
Jan 7th, 06:27
Tiehu gost tara koppja bhal din li baqghu jinhabbu u jirrispettaw lil xulxin. Illum hlief tisma b'separazzjonijiet u issa divorzju imma z-zwieg sar avventura temporanja ghal min irid li jkun hekk.Jekk bejn zewg mahbubin ma jkunx hemm Alla f'nofshom difficli li koppja jibqghu maghqudin sakemm il-mewt tifridhom. Zwieg huwa katina li ma tinhallx imma jekk tissega anella l-ghaqda tispicca
A.P.Naudi
E Schembri
Jan 7th, 11:31
Well said!
Today everybody talks about their rights and what he/she can do, but RESPONSIBILITY comes before rights!
God bless you.
stephen mifsud
Jan 7th, 03:33
Congratulations to you both what a beautiful story and marriage .. my parents were also married 69 years when they both passed on on the same year .. which tells me that there generation will never be matched ... and thanks Times of Malta for doung this story and sharing it us readers its a braeth of fresh air ....
Jonathan Abela
Jan 7th, 00:03
This is what 'True Love' is all about. Although today such values are not so popular, I do believe that in the future everyone will be able to appreciate more the richness and truth of such values.
Well done to this couple - leading by example. May God bless you and all our families.
Peter Agius
Jan 6th, 23:35
Commitment........that is the word. Hey is any body out there????????????????????
A pace
Jan 6th, 22:26
A heart warming story - so glad the Mrs is not so jealous any more! God bless a dear couple
Christine Bonello
Jan 6th, 20:34
How lovely they both are. What a pleasure to read and see this article in this day and age.
T Mifsud
Jan 6th, 20:10
Congratulations! May you continue laughing together as it was so nice to see! :)
Albert Zammit
Jan 6th, 20:09
Marriages like this are truly Maltese. Really true blue.
But for some reason Malta has changed like the rest of the world.
And I don't think we're going to see more like this marriage. A pity.
Andrew Terry Buttigieg
Jan 6th, 19:44
This warms my heart, and gives me hope that at least this sort of thing can happen in this generation. =)
twanny borg
Jan 6th, 18:13
Storja sabiha ta' imhabba vera. Darba wiehed qalli li l-anzjani taghna kollha jmorru il-genna u dan veru. Stejjer bhal dawn ghandna nirriflettu fuqhom.
Pule' Carmel
Jan 6th, 17:49
That is what it means when in Marriage two people become one!!
Prosit tassew to this couple.
A chocolate is a lovely way to pass the message that one loves! a flower is also a reasonable gesture, but on the top of the list is, a glance and a smile,they say it all, and what is more,we may learn to love many people through that,it is allowed to love everybody with a smile and a belonging gentle look
Robert Cefai
Jan 6th, 16:53
Congratulations and may God Bless Major and Mrs D'Anastasi. I worked with Major D'Anastasi way back in
1961 when I was a member of the Royal Malta Artillery. I learned a lot from him , He was in fact my role model and I still look up to him to this very day.
Patricia Pace
Jan 6th, 20:15
I remember you :)
Dunstan Crockford
Jan 6th, 16:13
Congratulations and may God Bless the SWEET couple! What a lovely relationship they shared!
Lorraine Farrugia
Jan 6th, 15:55
'i was determined not to leave this commitment', what beautiful words. Pity not so many people think the same way nowadays, life would be so much better. Congratulations and may the good Lord grant you many more years together xx
Charlene Bonnici
Jan 6th, 15:53
God Bless me and husband to reach that target !!!!!!!!
Josette Scicluna
Jan 6th, 19:02
As the saying goes "where there's a will, there's a way"! My target as well! Congrats to this romantic couple and God Bless!
James Tyrrell
Jan 6th, 15:47
What a nice story. Best wishes and all the health in the world to enjoy many more years together.
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