If anybody ever asks for a definition of ‘cringeworthy’, you might want to show them some footage of John Terry’s post-match celebrations last Saturday night.
It was, quite frankly, a rather sad display of ego- James Calvert
Following Chelsea’s unexpected yet impressive Champions League victory, the suspended defender joined in the celebrations like he had won the match single-handedly.
And, to make it even more embarrassing, he did so after changing out of his shirt and trousers and into his full Chelsea kit.
It was, quite frankly, a rather sad display of ego.
There are, of course, circumstances under which it might almost have been acceptable. Had Terry missed the final through injury, for example, his actions would have been understandable.
Or even if his suspension had come about as a result of some last-ditch heroic self-sacrifice made in the semi-final to ensure his team won through.
But Terry watched the clash with Bayern Munich from the stands for neither of those reasons. He was banned for a display of petulant thuggery against Barcelona which nearly ruined Chelsea’s Champions League dream and forced them to play half a match against the best team on the planet with 10 men.
The fact is, Chelsea made it to the final in spite of Terry’s contribution, not because of it.
So why did he feel he deserved to take so much credit for Chelsea lifting the trophy? Does he have no sense of shame or humility?
Some may point out that he contributed in earlier games. Which he most certainly did. But that’s what winners’ medals are for: recognition for all the members of the squad who took part in the campaign.
Don’t give me any ‘he’s the captain’ stuff either. Real captains don’t get themselves pointlessly sent off in their team’s hour of need.
It all boils down to a man who is just a little bit too full of his own self-importance. And he just couldn’t bear the thought that, when photos of Chelsea celebrating the historic win are shown in the future, he would not be in them.
But the simple fact is that he should not be in them. He didn’t play, he wasn’t on the bench and his only telling contribution in the last two matches was to get himself sent off for acting like a five-year-old bully in a playground.
Of slight consolation is the fact that he has, at least, made himself a bit of a laughing stock.
The internet has been awash with hundreds of Terry jokes last week, many of them superb. And people have also churned out some fantastic visual mock-ups of Terry celebrating other monumentous events he played no part in, like the first moon walk, bringing down the Berlin Wall and England’s 1966 World Cup triumph.
However, when all the hilarity dies down, as it inevitably will, and people look back on last weekend’s final in the years to come, the footage they see will be of a man who played no part in the match lifting the trophy.
And that is very unfair on the Chelsea players whose tireless efforts actually did win the club its first Champions League crown.
Meanwhile, a player who was involved in that game and who does deserve hero status has announced he is leaving Chelsea after eight years.
Despite what I have said about his propensity to dive, I do actually believe English football will be a poorer place without Didier Drogba gracing the pitches. Or lying on them.
If you are going to leave a club, then I think Drogba picked the perfect way to do it: scoring the equalising goal which set up extra time with a truly world-class header and then following that up by tucking away the winning penalty. In the Champions League final.
Farewell performances just don’t get more dramatic than that.
At 34 it was almost inevitable this season would be his last at the London club. He apparently wanted another two-year contract but Chelsea were understandably only prepared to offer him 12 months.
Yet he has departed without a hint of aminosity, saying how much he will always love the club and how his blood runs blue.
Now the Ivory Coast hitman is off to throw himself to the ground in a different country as he winds down his career.
China is one probable destination, maybe because they use a softer type of grass over there.
Joking aside, I think Drogba has actually been a brilliant servant to both Chelsea and English football for the best part of a decade. The only thing stopping him from achieving truly legendary status, in my mind at least, is that tendency to go down too easily.
But, looking back, we shouldn’t allow that to take too much away from his achievements. He scored 157 goals in 342 appearances during his time with Chelsea and won just about every major honour there was to be won during his time there.
A great player who will certainly go down as one of the Premiership’s best ever strikers.
And one whose celebrations last Saturday were entirely justified.
The dirty dozen
You would have to think that, following his record 12-match ban, Joey Barton’s time at the top level of football is all but over.
And that’s a rather sad end to what was once a promising career.
To be fair, I don’t agree with those people who have suggested his ban was too harsh. If Paolo di Canio got 11 matches for his mostly amusing push on a referee, then 12 games must be the minimum for trying to take on the entire Manchester City team in a street brawl.
Although in theory Barton could be back playing for Queens Park Rangers in November, will the club really want to be associated with a player whose anger management issues are so evidently out of control? And I really can’t see any other top-flight clubs wanting to take a gamble on him either. Too much of a wild card and, at 30, unlikely to change his ways.
The best he can really hope for is to drop down a division, slightly out of the limelight, and try to rebuild his reputation in a calm and controlled manner.
Unfortunately, calm and controlled are not two words Barton seems to understand. He can’t even run a Twitter account without annoying the world.
Your say
“After having a good look at Roy Hodgson’s selection for Euro 2012, I must admit I am a little perplexed about some of the choices he has made.
“Being a Liverpool fan, I was pleased to see three of our players make it into the squad, but leaving quality players such as Adam Johnson, Aaron Lennon and Daniel Sturridge at home and opting for someone like Stewart Downing instead is way beyond me.
“These are three thrilling wingers who are a joy to watch with the ball at their feet, while Downing makes me down half-a-pint every time he has the ball, because it’s useless keeping your eyes on the box as most probably nothing will happen.
“I also find it odd that Peter Crouch was overlooked as he just had a great season with Stoke City, while players like Andy Carroll and Jermaine Defoe spent most of their season either misfiring or sitting on the bench.
“One final thought goes to Michael Carrick. I personally believe Carrick is one of the best holding midfield players in the Premiership, and I believe his style of play would have served England very well in a tournament like this.
“He is very under-rated and deserves better recognition. He surely would have been a vital asset had he been selected, the same way he is vital for his club, although few people recognise this.
“I am sure most of your readers will probably disagree with my views, but for me Carrick is must for both club and country.
“Pity that Hodgson will also have to do without two fantastic players, Kyle Walker and Jack Wilshere.” Jason Bartolo, e-mail.
sportscolumnist@timesofmalta.com
Twitter: @maltablade