Why do we need to hear it through the online grapevine, asks Christina Goggi.

Gossip – let those who are without sin cast the first stone. Because, let’s face it, we have all listened to and fed rumours and gossip, succumbing to listening, watching or passing snide remarks about others in the office kitchenette. But what is it like when the victim of such hearsay is you?

Our relatively small community has always been known to be fertile ground for gossip – another possible explanation for the popularity of social media in Malta.

Yet the ‘social’ in social media can be people’s downfall, because once something is written about you online, you cannot delete it.

By wrapping users in a fun environment, social media can turn into a source of escapism which can sometimes distort people’s understanding of reality. People forget that there can be serious consequences to their participation in social media. The ‘entertainment mode’ on sites like Facebook and Twitter can take away barriers that would otherwise prevent people from sharing intimate details about themselves.

With social media, George Orwell’s 1984 Big Brother concept is brought to life, although here it is generally self-inflicted. Images, videos, status updates, groups, pages and several other options offered by social media can compromise a person’s integrity.

Take the simplest example – photo tags. Your friend decides to post some images taken the night before and tags you in them. Harmless, you would think. Well, let’s imagine that in one of these shots you appear like you’ve got someone’s hands all over you (in reality, you were just dancing) – people are already spreading the word and you are in for a good clash with your partner.

Sure, you can always remove the tag or simply ask your friends to delete that particular image. Sadly, it doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes people post images of you without asking for your approval and, although they might not tag you, your image is still online – and by the time you find out, most of your mutual contacts would have already seen it.

The worst thing is that some people don’t seem to realise the damage that online gossip can cause when taken a step too far, especially in the case of teenagers. There’s a current case in Melbourne, for example, where teenagers have joined a Facebook group which spread allegations about teachers having sex with pupils, girls who trade sex for drugs and other defamatory information. The victims are currently being offered counselling, while the ones involved in the group are being disciplined.

Such cases are a timely reminder that there’s a very fine line between online gossip and cyber-bullying, and that this line can be easily crossed – resulting in harmful repercussions.

The need for more control over privacy has therefore become very critical. Upcoming platforms, such as Google+, seem to be very much aware of this as they are enabling users to easily group up close friends and acquaintances separately – allowing them to share personal information only with the people closest to them.

That said, when used smartly, social media sites can actually improve the lives of many people and can work as a great promotional tool, besides offering many other benefits. Here I have just outlined another aspect of these sites as people sometimes need to be reminded of the consequences before taking certain actions.

Unfortunately a good number of social media users sign up to these sites because everyone else is doing it, without first evaluating, understanding and becoming aware of how they can affect their lives, or what security measures need to be taken before creating an account for anyone to access.

In Facebook we don’t trust

Neville Zammit
25, nurse

Why don’t you currently use Facebook?

First of all I don’t need to use it for business purposes, and I don’t feel comfortable sharing private things, especially photos, with all my acquaintances. I believe Facebook creates a barrier to real socialising – if a friend wants to catch up with me, we can do it over a drink with no rush, but not on Facebook. If I want to chat with a friend, I want to actually chat in person and not type. I am very sociable in real life, which is why I find Facebook useless.

Have you used social media sites before?

No, and I don’t intend to.

Do your friends or family ask you to use Facebook?

Yes, some friends and family ask me to use Facebook all the time. I don’t want Facebook to become a shortcut to family and friends; I prefer visiting and being physically present instead of just interacting with a profile picture.

Do you feel like you’re missing out on anything by not using Facebook?

Not at all. I think people who are using Facebook are missing out on real, tangible sociable lives.


Sonia Micallef
28, divisional director with an insurance broker

Why don’t you currently use Facebook?

I feel social media reveals too much about a person’s personal life – what they are doing in their life, the places they go to, who they hang out with, even what they are wearing. I believe only people you really trust should know about your life – other people and new acquaintances should want to get to know you as a person for who you are and not because you have cool pictures on Facebook or because you have so many friends on your profile.

I know it’s up to the person to reveal so much about themselves, but I believe other viewers use information and photos to talk about others and spread information to other people who may not be your friends, or are just out there to gossip, without any interest in you as a person.

Have you used social media sites before?

I have used MSN in the past, but not any more. I upgraded my PC and never bothered to re-install it. Moreover, I simply don’t have the time anymore to sit down and chat to people online. I prefer meeting them in person, talking to them on the phone, or use Skype with my friends abroad.

Do your friends or family ask you to use Facebook?

My friends continuously ask me to use Facebook. They even went as far as creating an account for me – twice. I wasn’t too pleased about that, as it was kind of disrespectful since they did not respect the boundaries I like to keep.

It is also such a nuisance to close a Facebook account. Also, as soon as they opened the account for me, I have received heaps of friend invites from people I know and have not seen in years. Why do some people fail to stay in touch in real life but then they are the first to send you a friend request online? And if they are really that interested to know what’s going on in my life, why did they never bother to send me a text or e-mail?

Do you feel like you’re missing out on anything by not using Facebook?

Not really. If I want to know what’s happening, my friends usually update me. I can definitely live without Facebook, and to be honest I think it’s simpler this way.


Burak Hun
30, web marketer

Why don’t you currently use Facebook?

I find it a big waste of time – I’d rather spend that time with my family and dogs.

Have you used social media sites before?

Yes, I have used Facebook and Hi5 but don’t use them any more. I have no interest in other people’s lives and they don’t need anyone to have an interest in mine.

Do your friends or family ask you to use Facebook?

Yes, but I prefer to use that time doing other activities like going to the gym and playing with my children and dogs. Looking at other people’s photos doesn’t give me any satisfaction.

Do you feel like you’re missing out on anything by not using Facebook?

Absolutely not.

Ms Goggi is an English graduate currently working as a web marketing copywriter.

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