Divorce lawyers for U dot com

Storyboard for 30-second advert for divorcelawyersforU.com.

First frame: Still shot of a man and a woman in their 30s standing back to back, both with arms folded and unhappy faces turned to camera.

Voice over (calm but authoritative How are things at home these days?

Frame two: Interior. We see the man descending the stairs of what appears to be a middle-class Maltese house. He does not look happy. He opens a door and exits the shot.

Frame three: Interior the kitchen/breakfast room of the same house.

Inside is the 30-something woman in a dressing gown and slippers, she is preparing breakfast. She does not look happy.

Frame four: The man enters the kitchen/breakfast room and sits at the laid breakfast table. He opens a newspaper. He still does not look happy. He ignores the woman.

Frame five: The woman bangs down a plate of scrambled eggs in front of the man. She now looks positively aggressive. He registers no emotion, but eats the eggs after first glaring at them and shaking his head.

Frame six: The woman bangs the frying pan down hard on the kitchen draining board, glares at the eating man and exits the shot after slamming the door.

Frame seven: Freeze frame of the man with a forkful of breakfast near his mouth. He still does not look happy.

Voice over: Are things not all they used to be in your marital relationship?

Frame eight: Interior bedroom. We see the woman from the previous scenes lying under a duvet in a double bed, we see she’s in curlers and apparently asleep.

We see the man from the previous scenes, in pyjamas, he gets out of the double bed clutching his duvet and a pillow and exits the shot through the bedroom door. He looks decidedly unhappy.

Frame nine: Interior, the upstairs landing. The man enters the shot carrying the duvet and pillow and moves down the landing away from the camera towards a door. He exits the shot through this door. He still looks extremely unhappy.

Frame 10: Interior second bedroom containing a single bed. The man enters the shot through the door and lies on the bed, pulling the duvet over him and placing the pillow under his head. He looks downright miserable.

Frame 11: Freeze frame of the man in bed looking miserable.

Voice over: Are things not all they were in the bedroom?

Frame 12: Interior second bedroom: The man sits up in bed and answers the voice over with a wry nod of the head and a sigh. He sits on the bed listening to the voice over.

Voice over: Thinking of putting an end to this intolerable situation?

The man nods vigorously and enthusiastically.

Voice over: Then we can help.

Frame 13: Fade to interior of a law office. Bookcases full of legal tomes, a large desk, with the owner of the voice – a distinguished looking character in dark suit and tie – sitting behind the desk.

Frame 14: He speaks to camera. “We are DivorcelawyersforU.com.” These words appear on the bottom of the screen.

Frame 15: The man at the desk turns at right angles to face a camera (Camera two) to his right.

He continues to address it. “We guarantee to get you a divorce with minimal fuss and at a fraction of the cost of hiring an ordinary grasping Maltese lawyer. Give us a call today on 2022 2222 or find us online at divorcelawyersforU.com.”

Frame 16: Interior single bedroom. The man is sitting on the bed, but now he looks much happier. In fact he grins broadly, nods and says, “divorcelawyersforU.com. Ill call them today.”

Note: Do not – repeat, not – shoot this advert until Parliament passes the Bill to permit divorce in the country.