Sadie Frost has spoken of her struggle with depression during her marriage to actor Jude Law, admitting she once slashed her arm with a pair of scissors.
The celebrity couple’s high-profile relationship ended in divorce in 2003 after they had three children together.
Ms Frost was a 25-year-old married mother-of-one when she met Mr Law, who was then a 19-year-old unknown.
In her autobiography out next month, the actress-turned-fashion designer describes the instant attraction they felt.
In serialised extracts of Crazy Days, which appeared in the Mail on Sunday, Ms Frost said: “I knew by even entertaining thoughts of Jude, I was jeopardising an idyllic home life, the most secure relationship I’d ever had.”
But, she added, her love and his “intense ambition” made her feel “out of control”.
Ms Frost, now 45, went on to leave husband Spandau Ballet star Gary Kemp before she and Mr Law moved in together to her Primrose Hill home in north London.
But with Mr Law’s Hollywood career taking off, he spent long spells away filming and Ms Frost said she pressed the “self-destruct” button after the birth of their son Rafferty in 1996.
After hospital treatment and medication, Ms Frost and Mr Law married in 1997.
But Ms Frost said depression set in again after the births of daughter Iris in October 2000 and son Rudy in September 2002, explaining how illness added to the strain on their turbulent marriage.
“Jude was up for lots more roles and I was still feeling low, struggling to hold the relationship together, feeling threatened,” she said.
With Rudy still a baby, Ms Frost said she knew the marriage was over following a family holiday to Thailand.
“I asked him if he loved me but he didn’t need to reply – I knew the answer,” she said. “The moment had arrived and I knew the relationship with the man I loved was over.”
Ms Frost, who checked herself into a clinic to be treated for depression, said she now enjoyed a happy home life.
“Every morning I wake with my four children,” she said. “We have at least seven cups of tea during the day and at night we have cups of cocoa and cuddles.
“Glamorous it ain’t, but it’s real life, and I’m happy.”