How children's birth order affects classroom dynamics

There were once six blind men who had to describe an elephant according to their own perception based on touch. They all did so, but 'though each was partly in the right, all were in the wrong', wrote US poet John G. Saxe, who introduced the Indian parable 'The blind men and the elephant' to the Western world.

For one of the blind men, who happened to feel the animal's tail, the elephant seemed to be like a rope. For another, the elephant was definitely like a wall. For the third man, fumbling the animal's ear, the elephant was like a fan, and so the story goes on.

The lesson from this Indian legend implies that we all see and try to understand ourselves, others and our surroundings according to our perceptions. Furthermore, as psychotherapist Alfred Adler says, we draw our own perceptions based on the way we see and interpret things even if this happens to be based on a blurred image or 'blind vision', as is often the case with children.

There are a number of factors that may influence the formation of a child's vision or personality. One of these influences is the order in which they are born within their family, or birth order. We speak of both chronological and psychological birth order, but here I limit myself to the chronological birth order and its general guidelines. These guidelines apply as long as there is less than a five-year gap between siblings.

One might rightly ask what six blind men, an elephant, and birth order have got to do with a class of students and educators? Yes, there is a link; in fact, it is not only a link but a tool that can benefit and improve the teacher-student relationship by promoting better understanding.

Many educators would easily agree that class dynamics vary from year to year even if the students' grade is the same. This comes as no surprise when one considers the important variable of students' birth order. It would be wise if, through informal class meetings at the beginning of the scholastic year, teachers get to know their students' birth order. This knowledge would be complemented by teachers learning various techniques on how to handle birth order-related behaviour.

Knowing how many first-borns are in class will give an indication of the number of potential leaders in the group. First-borns are usually nurturers, people pleasers, reliable, cooperative, and may crave for approval. They may also tend to like to be in control and have things their own way.

Having one first-born in a class could be fine, but what if there are two, three or more? This may lead to clique formation and power struggles. When planning team/group work, it would make life easier for both the team and the teacher if there is only one first-born in each group.

First-borns are usually achievers. More than half of the US presidents were first-borns, as were 21 out of 23 astronauts.

The story of 'middle children' is slightly different. Middle children might embark on two separate and almost opposite routes. Middle child X may be a loner, shy, impatient and introvert while middle child Y may be outgoing, friendly, loud, and patient. It all depends on the individual's interpretation of events.

What could be said for both is that a middle child could be difficult to handle. The child is usually very much on the lookout for injustice, as life seems to be 'unfair' when seen through the eyes of a middle child. On the other hand, middle children are good negotiators and can be quite flexible as they learn to cope with elder siblings and younger ones. In other words, a middle child can work with both superiors and subordinates.

Teachers can expect middle children in their class to be creative, artistic, peacemakers, stubborn and take their own time to finish tasks. Knowing all this might ease unnecessary stress or friction on both sides.

What about last-borns or the baby of the family? Having to follow the privileged position of the first-born and the sandwiched position of the middle child, the last-born usually attracts attention by being cute, sociable, affectionate and risk-taking. The child may nurture a sense of humour and be a confident hard worker.

On the other hand, this birth position can lead to the development of the art of manipulation, self-centredness and immaturity. Last-borns in class tend to go against the norm and turn out to be the odd-man-out.

Finally what about an only child? These might have the traits of first-borns but mature faster, use adult language and prefer older friends. They may have difficulty sharing but can set their own goals and work hard to achieve them. On the other hand, they can be spoilt, for as mentioned earlier, other factors, such as parenting style, play a role in the development of the child's personality.

These are the most common birth order positions and their likely traits but is understandable that some might not fit in. There is still a lot more to say about birth order and its effect on personality. Life's circumstances, such as the death of a child or parent, adoption, separation, and illness can change the way an individual sees things. Each story has its own uniqueness.

All this shows how many different skills a teacher needs for effective class management. An educator who is aware of, and puts into practice the insight gained from such concepts is like a magician equipped with a number of magic tricks that can be pulled out of a hat to break resistance and enhance relationships with charm and an open-eyed vision.