What your wife won't tell you!

Your lovely wife can become a demon should you buy her something from this list for Christmas. Always remember that women talk, your bad gift will be brought up for months to come when you're in the company of others. The women will brand you the worst husband in the world, next to their own. The men will nod and sigh resignedly.

First of all, do not take a throw away comment as a hint as to what she wants for Christmas. This is the most common mistake husbands make. As men notoriously hate shopping, you will pick up on anything to avoid trawling around the busy shops.

No self improvement products of any kind should find their way into your wife's Christmas stocking. No books, DVD's, face creams or exercise equipment. When she opens one of these you won't get a "thank you darling" you will get "so you think I'm fat, old etc". If you want to be ignored and met with a wall of silence for the next 6 months, then buy her these by all means.

So she admired those new pans that cook everything in half the time. You think she'll really appreciate them as you'll be making her life easier. Yes, you might be, but you are making your life into a living hell. If the pans aren't smacked off your head once she's opened them, you can guarantee sarcasm every time she uses them. "I'm putting dinner on darling; I'll use the pans YOU got me for Christmas!" Trust me; it's simply not worth it.

Dressing gowns, slippers and underwear are other things to avoid. This may come as a surprise, as they are kind of things we use to fall back on. That's the exact reason you should never buy them, they are too safe. No thought has gone into them, and she knows it.

The same goes for bath products. We all have our favourites, and your wife is perfectly happy to get her own while out shopping. The only exception here is if you get her a luxury brand which you know she will appreciate.

On the whole, you need to make sure that you never buy your wife what you would buy for your mother. If your wife has complimented your mother on her perfume, she could just be being polite. She may personally think it smells like wet socks, so don't go and buy a bottle for both of them. Chances are, your wife's bottle will be put away and given to your mother next Christmas!

Ask your wife what she wants for Christmas, and top up her gifts with things such as jewellery which you know she will like. Then in the coming months, she will be telling others that you are the best husband in the world!