Privileged cyclists (2)

Profound apologies to Ronald Abela (October 19) for accusing him of doing something as horribly old-fashioned as throwing rotten tomatoes, something, he rightly says, we both did in our student days. He is right, we really must fast-forward to the 21st century where tomato throwing is passé and shoe throwing is the rage - as dictated by trend-setting Iraq. The real modernity crux, however, is that the 21st century is also the century which will inform us whether the human race, along with many other unsuspecting species on our planet, might come to a messy end as a result of climate change. But enough digression; the burning issue is those two unanswered questions.

The first question concerns a Mini crashing into a Jaguar. The answer here is quite simple: in this day and age anybody who drives a car which emits more than 120 grams of carbon dioxide for every kilometre travelled should be immediately imprisoned for wilful, premeditated murder of the future population of the planet. Therefore a Jaguar has no business on the road, it belongs in a well-appointed garage where it can be admired and serve as a status symbol, a much cherished object of love and admiration which is regularly polished with great dedication; but such murderous gas guzzling high-carbon emitting vehicles must certainly not be allowed on today's roads. So, the answer to the first question is as follows: full marks to the low carbon-emitting Mini for eliminating another high-carbon emitting vehicle from our roads.

The second question is not at all a matter of convoluted logic. "Elementary, Dr Watson!" Sherlock what's-his-name would have said, "a question of simple basic algebra, my dear fellow. P+B is greater than P - especially if that Person's Bicycle is in low gear when it hit the Pedestrian".