James A. Marples, Longview, Texas, US
Silvio Berlusconi's behaviour
The Prime Minister of Italy, Silvio Berlusconi, may be generating news headlines by his private behaviour; but his alleged conduct is nothing "new". Many men - especially in Italy - have sought out young, nubile female companions. The current Mrs Berlusconi is the second wife from which Mr Berlusconi has become estranged. His first marriage was dissolved over 20 years ago.
Marriage should not be treated merely as a sexual licence; nor should divorce be treated as an escape-hatch or a lid to a garbage can for disposable, discardable or throwaway human interactions.
Many people seek to be married - yet they only have the immature urge to be "seen together" as a pair; a couple.
This does not make a marriage. Holy Matrimony was instituted and ordained by Almighty God. The solemn bond between man and woman was meant to be an ongoing uniting of souls, and not just a meagre ceremony "for the record books". Witnesses weren't just guests; they were to be mindful observers of those solemn promises...and fly to the aid of either spouse, as supportive marriage-counsellors, if a marital crisis arose in the future.
In Mr Berlusconi's case, he likely never received the firm undergirding of support from family, friends, and Roman Catholic clergy. Nor did he have the protective umbrella of shame and stigma hanging over his head if he violated his promise. His notions of marriage seem to have been "pro forma" or for appearances' sake to fit the expected biographical sketch of a politician.
Back during the Old Testament period of the Bible, many virile men had plural marriages. Wives were not discarded. Family units were intact and children prospered. Men were not hypocrites when they acknowledged they engaged in that practice, which was solemnized by clerics.
Polygamy should not be confused with infidelity. Polygamy is simply setting up another family and maintaining it; but infidelity is a romantic fling that accomplishes nothing but fleeting affairs for self-gratification. Having lovers on the side is nothing new. But, for a politician it creates a need for some type of resolution as toward reconciling one's actions with one's stated beliefs. Mr Berlusconi has never made clear what his future intentions are.
Pouring the cement of a marriage may take a day. But enabling that cement to take on a lasting firmness takes time, perseverance and commitment. The strength of any marriage depends upon the strength of the Vows.
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joseph portelli
Sep 15th 2009, 04:56
Its an insult to all human beings, assuming that 'verile men' have plural marriages.
Its like blaming all robberies on the poor or the unemployed. Most poor don't steal, neither most unemployed.
Mr Berlusconi does what he does because he is what he is and it has bugger all to do with normal human beings -
The strenght on any communion including marriage depends on sharing same values not just the strenght of the Vows. If the values are different, at some stage sooner or later it will fall apart.
Society has allowed different values to be introduced to communities and change society itself. Today instead of tolerance and demonstarting tenderness towards others are replaced by judging or even hatred. People make mistakes and should be valued as people but what they do must not be accepted. Today we condem the person! that judgment then becomes a cultural value ' judge & condemn' .
As the most famous soul said 2000 years ago, first person that never sinned throw the first stone - that is what we should value , that people are just humans and we should not idolize nor condemn.