Are petards here to stay?

I'm quite sure that if you had to flick through copies of local newspapers published five or even 10 years ago, you'd find that the letters pages have not changed much.Perhaps you'd find more letters from the members of the anti-topless lobby back then. They seem to have gone strangely silent recently (Perhaps everybody has taken heed and covered up?). And, of course, you'd definitely come across that staple of the letters pages in summer - the irate letters from people driven to desperation by the noisy petards let off at all hours of day and night, before, during and after, the celebration of the village festa.

Since I live in a festa-dense zone, where I have to put up with the awful racket of six parishes throughout summer, I empathise with the letter-writers. I know what it feels like to be kept awake at night when the chumps are let loose with their explosives. I know how frayed nerves get as one evening after another is punctuated with deafening booms and it becomes impossible to have a decent conversation or enjoy an evening out. You'd think that the petards - and here we're only talking about the pointless bangs and not about the colourful fireworks displays - would have been banned by now. They're a nuisance and their attractiveness quotient is limited.

And yet they continue to be let off, while all objectors can do is let off steam in the papers and sign petitions which are routinely ignored by politicians and the authorities who are in a position to do something about the situation. I attribute this staying power of the pro-petard people to the creative way they've used to describe and market something which is essentially an infernal din. Whenever they're faced with criticism or a call for restrictions on the times during which petards may be let off, the fire fanatics insist that they are an integral part of the Maltese identity and an established tradition.

Only recently someone wrote, "A feast without the big bangs is not a feast at all... This is part of what attracts tourists to our feasts and fireworks displays... this is Malta, our heritage, our culture, our identity. This is what makes us what we are and the tourists love it."

There are so many incorrect assumptions in those lines, which put my teeth on edge. Firstly, the absurd conclusion that "big bangs" are an indispensable element of festa celebrations. They're not. A feast is essentially a celebration held to honour the patron saint of a particular town or village. I can think of no saint who had a fetish for ear-splitting explosions and who would feel greatly honoured by them.

My guess is that a few good works carried out without much fanfare, or a donation to a worthy cause, would achieve the same aim, without annoying most of the people in the vicinity. Even if the whole honouring-the-saint aspect had to bypassed, a feast could be celebrated just as exuberantly with all the fireworks, street decorations and band marches necessary, but with the omission of the petards.

The assertion that tourists flock to Malta to revel in a bang barrage is also off the mark. While there may be a few who find Malta charmingly indisciplined, the majority of them find no joy in the noisy interruptions to their holiday. Earlier this year, I read about a Swedish expat who just couldn't take the blasts. The online marketing manager lived in Valletta and tried to block out the noise by wearing ear-plugs. They had little effect. He was afraid that the noise would aggravate his sensitivity to loud noise and left the island for summer. So much for foreigners being attracted to the booming.

He also made an interesting comment about the argument that the letting of off petards constitutes some sort of tradition. He said: "I have full respect for traditions, but this doesn't make sense. There is a line between traditions and insanity. We had the Vikings, but we moved on. I can't tell the Maltese to change things... but this must surely have an impact on the lives of many people."

I couldn't agree more. There is no evidence of a long-standing tradition of petard-blasting. I remember feasts being much less noisy and more pleasant affairs. It's only during recent years that we've witnessed a profusion of petards - probably because they are cheaper to produce than the spectacular and colourful fireworks and need less skill to set off, so any idiot with a lighter can do the job.

But even if petards ever constituted some proud tradition practised by our forefathers, it should be stopped seeing that it is a nuisance which is a cause of discomfort for the old, the sick, young children and everyone else who deserves a good night's sleep. Not everything that is traditional is necessarily good. Footbinding was a Japanese tradition, circumcision is a tradition practised in some parts of the world. Civilised people don't seek to perpetuate them or barbaric practices. Likewise, the petard-enthusiasts shouldn't continue their insensitive hobby.

I have faint hopes of this happening. Not content with polluting our soundscape, they've now flocked to Facebook and formed a group called Favur il-Murtali Tradizzjonali f'Malta (in favour of traditional petards in Malta). And there in cyber-space the lovers of all things Maltese, the fine upholders of our heritage discuss their 'hobby' on a forum entitled Ahna Iridu Il-Murtali Tal-Lob. Nisimaw Il-Hsejjes U Nisimaw It-Tfiqija... Min Ma Jogbuhx... Iwarbilna. A translation of this would read, 'We want fireworks. We want noise and we want to listen to the bangs. Those who dislike them should get out of the way.'

There are barely three words spelled correctly in the original Maltese version. It seems that the petard-pyromaniacs only insist on safeguarding an annoying practice which they insist is a tradition, but know next to nothing of their mother tongue - one element of the country's identity. The aggressive exhortation for objectors to get out of the way reflects the mindset of people who are no better than thugs foisting their unwanted noise waste on the rest of us.

cl.bon@nextgen.net.mt