Points of view

'I knew her when...' is an unfinished sentence with innumerable nuances.

So it's only to be expected that the old tapes of a 22-year-old Susan Boyle would be dug out of quasi-oblivion and featured on Youtube. In this way, people may - and do - contrast the then with the now; and it is worth noting that although Ms Boyle sang a Barbra Streisand cover, she did not win the contest.

But Youtube and La Corrida moments are not made solely of successes; far from it. Denise Richards has proved it by mangling Take Me Out To The Ball Game, the song that is the unofficial anthem of baseball.

It takes gumption - or insouciance - to sing certain songs in front of an audience, yet Streisand songs are only a sample of what Maltese singers will attempt when they are either on talent shows or as guest singers on other programmes.

The fact that they miss the high notes, or waffle words, highlights their audacity and arrogance. Just for the record, Richards did have reservations about her voice - but she wanted to raise awareness about kidney cancer for a charity that she volunteers for. Her singing became an internet hit, albeit for the wrong reasons.

Speaking of junk television at its nadir - who can go lower than the so-called 'Search to find Paris Hilton's British best friend'?

• Many complain that Magic FM plays the same tunes over and over again; others like the station precisely for that reason. Be that as it may, occasionally an invitation goes out on air for listeners to send in their own lists.

The last time I listened to Magic (Saturday evening), this call went out again. I submitted my list - and it bounced. The reason was that so many people sent in their lists that the mailbox jammed - but now the system is working perfectly.

I would suggest that if and when the people in charge of emptying the mailbox are not available, the bumph does not go out.

• On Thursday evening, I was watching e-news on Education 22. One of the topics was the abuse to which elderly residents of rest homes may be subjected, by relatives who fleece them and then do not provide them with basic requisites.

Frankly, I stopped counting after the dreaded word familjari was said at least 20 times by the interviewer and the social worker to whom she was speaking. What raised my hackles was the atrocious editing.

The topic was not in the least funny - and during a particularly salient point being made by the social worker, the interviewer was actually laughing, possibly at something that was happening off-camera.

• What are the rules governing the 'PG' and 'AO' stamps on local productions? Are they voluntary? If they do not exist, must the programmes in question be edited before they are shown before the watershed hour?

These questions zapped through my mind because this week, we had a PG rating for a scene where the cremated remains of a dead person were flushed down a toilet before the magic hour. Another scene, in a different production, had no rating at all, but was shown during the late evening. However, I do not know whether there will be a repeat. It showed a kidnap scene, where the captors were (ostensibly) using coercion and violence.

I would also like to know what the Broadcasting Authority deems as subliminal advertising. What, for instance, are the views of this body when the font in which the logo of a programme is written, resembles that of a product with a very similar name?

• Once again, it was Crunch Time.... meaning Awards and Statistics Time (my capitals). Last Sunday, this newspaper published the names of all those who won an award or six. However, as was to be expected, other media highlighted only the winners from their stables, and treated the happening as a non-event, if they had none. It was the same with the viewership and listenership statistics that have recently been published.

This indicates a pathetic dearth of esprit de corps, not to mention sour grapes. Just for the record, the audience survey study covered the first three months of this year - and apart from the respondents (just over 5 per cent) who said that they did not watch television, there were also 0.2 per cent of those who said they do not own a television set.

This, however, could be misleading, since they could be watching their favourite shows streamed via their personal computer and yet declined to mention this - perhaps because they had the mistaken idea that it was illegal and could create problems for them if they admitted it.

• A disk jockey thought he would lend his programmes some interest by including dates of birth and death of the artists whose songs he played. It sounded so repetitive - and, thankfully, lasted only for one day. He, too, must have found himself boring.

television@timesofmalta.com