Manners maketh media

Ann Landers says there are two things you never ought to do in bed - eat and cut your toenails.

Be that as it may, there are several things that one ought not to do on the audio/visual/written media. And yet, they are done all day, every day, albeit in different places.

I have always wanted to be a fly on the wall at one of those gatherings when the ambience is casual and hair is let down. During black tie events such as launches, (almost) everyone is on best-behaviour mode, and (most) are dressed to kill, and (some) simper away, dispensing air-kisses, and fluttering their hands in faux helplessness.

Finally, the opportunity came my way without expecting it. A couple of Sundays ago, with time on my hands, I decided to take a walk. I came upon a group of media personalities (each of whom shall remain nameless), on their way to a birthday lunch. Perhaps inevitably, they were talking shop, and I could not resist listening in for a while. And it was very enlightening.

Some appeared to have a chip on their shoulder because the Broadcasting Authority had nabbed them for infringements that, they reiterated, "did no harm at all".

I chimed in on this, saying that although this may be true, one had to draw the line somewhere. It is now old news that PBS used up precious man-hours editing Thunderbirds of sequences where the (puppet) characters are seen smoking.

However, this week, when I was zapping through local channels, I couldn't help commenting that 'everyone' recognises a 7Up bottle, just as everyone recognises the waxed-paper wrapper of a Golden Harvest sliced loaf.

Apparently, unless a listener, or a viewer, lodges a complaint, no steps will be taken by the TV watchdog. I therefore understand that the thousands of people who have watched the different dramas did not complain - they just needed some relaxation time to watch the story.

These episodes were both repeats, and therefore, this infringement happened at least twice over and nobody batted an eyelid.

There have been several occasions in the past where an item that was mentioned in one particular section of a magazine programme, and later on in another context, that the latter was taken as being subliminal advertising.

Then there is the advertisement, which goes on air again and again, describing a particular venue as "just across the road" from another. I was under the impression that an establishment that is not paying for the bumph must not be used as a landmark for an hour.

This reminds me of yet another anomaly - since when has a presenter won the right to read adverts in his or her own programme? This is happening once again, even when the said broadcaster would not have been the one to purchase the airtime for the programme in question.

Then there is the constant, pathetic, use of puerile humour by certain disc-jockeys to lighten up the early morning or afternoon periods for listeners. Sometimes, this annoys me so much that I prefer to listen to my own choice of music via CD.

Another topic that came up was the newspaper reviews on different radio stations. I have always thought it sounds odd when these are broadcast back-to-back with news bulletins, because in this day and age, news can be culled off the internet literally as it happens.

So it is not the first time that news bulletins include facts that would not have happened yet when the people doing the newspaper reviews select what they would have thought newsworthy. Ideally, these newspaper reviewers ought to say something to the effect that "...since this report was compiled, of course, we know that...". But the person in this gathering, who is obliquely involved in a news programme, told me that the job of a newspaper reviewer stops at reviewing newspapers.

However, this sometimes happens also in news bulletins where the same item is broadcast again and again, without updates, on a particular station.

A case in point is last week's illegal immigrants' incident, where, well after the vessel had been re-routed towards Italy, we were still being told that there was a stand-off about it between Malta and Italy.

• I think it would have been a good idea to include regular live links from the Festival Nazzjonali tal-Ktieb to the Education Channel, and perhaps Campus FM as well.

• There is also the tiny detail of delay systems on radio stations. Some listeners know about this, and time their call accordingly. As an audience, we have a responsibility not to impose our views upon others.

But there is one snag to this. If I had to call a radio station, and insult a guest, I would be cut off immediately. However, if someone else had to call immediately, with the same purpose, the chances are that his call would come in.

However, the delay system or even a monitoring system does not exist for the messages running across television screens.

One reads - apart from pathetic Maltese and English - implied insults and also, on occasion, inferred accusations of corruption. Are the telephone numbers from which these messages emanate collected, so that relevant action may be taken?

But it is not only listeners who lack manners sometimes. It is common courtesy to thank a person who would have replaced you for a programme when you could not do it yourself for personal reasons.

Yet, somehow, even this iota of civility escapes some people.

television@timesofmalta.com