Bar of soap that turned to gold

The secrets to a successful 50-year relationship are "patience, shut mouths and a bar of soap", according to Gloria Zammit, who has just celebrated half a century of married life.

While the last ingredient arouses curiosity, the second is hard to believe, given that Mrs Zammit does all the talking and only falls silent to sip some wine and nibble her lunch at the Hotel Phoenicia.

It was here that they tied the knot 50 years ago, and they recently returned to celebrate their golden anniversary.

Back to the soap... that was how it all started, the smart and sophisticated lady explains. She used to buy toiletries and magazines from a stationery in Birkirkara. Once, she took the magazines and left the bar of soap she bought behind. Joe Zammit, who worked with his father, chased her all the way home, and the rest is history...

The joke is that he started running after Mrs Zammit - literally - from day one, but she is quick to say that she too started buying lots of magazines, going to the shop regularly and waiting for him.

Mrs Zammit giggles in the background but lets his wife continue their story, preferring to keep his mouth shut.

The couple spent seven years courting and got married when she was 24 and he 27. Mrs Zammit had lived with her grandmother since her mother had died when she was a baby. "When my grandmother died, in those old days, it was unheard of to leave a girl alone in a home..." So rather than live alone, Mrs Zammit moved to Mr Zammit's family, with the blessing of the archpriest.

Her father had remarried and moved to the UK and none of her relatives would take her and her brother in.

Despite the reasons behind the move, the prim and proper lady is still uneasy about saying she lived with Mr Zammit before marriage, and returns to the matter several times during the conversation to clarify that they slept in separate rooms and on different floors.

Looking back, her relationship is not tarnished by any regrets. "We did not really have hard times, although pays were low," she says, recalling that they did up their home and brought up two children with Lm26 a month. Employed with Barclays Bank, Mrs Zammit took home a mere Lm11.

"Today, people want it all and at once," she laments.

The highlight of her "good life" was most certainly when her two boys were young. She was strict and they were obedient, never disturbing a single night's sleep.

Mr Zammit, however, did not get to enjoy that phase too much as he would work late, she points out.

Things have changed from the days of their courtship, which consisted of a 6 p.m. movie, the recital of the rosary and some TV before bed. And some changes are to the detriment of relationships...

Mrs Zammit blames the breakdown of many marriages on the fact that women work, and she does not mask her disapproval: "A married woman's place is in the home to greet her husband when he returns, have supper ready and bring up the children!"

Neither does she agree that children should be brought up by their grandmothers - both for the latter and for the kids' own good. Maybe it is because Ms Zammit herself was brought up by a nanny.

Today, life is calm for the Zammits. Mrs Zammit is nocturnal and gets up late - only when her coffee is delivered to her bedside by her husband. By the time he has taken back the cup and walked halfway down the stairs, she is asleep again. He then proceeds to chauffeur her around, because Mrs Zammit's is a case of "can drive, won't drive".

One morning is spent at the hairdresser's, setting her silver hair, which matches her nail polish and her jewellery; the other is spent shopping around.

Organising their anniversary was like organising their wedding - it took a year of preparation. But Mr Zammit wanted it at all costs. He is told this is his "department", but even then, he is reluctant to take the cue and voice his views.

The couple won't be organising another - Mrs Zammit thinks she'll be in heaven and says: "We'll meet there... with a bar of soap!"