I thought that I'm naïve, but Jennifer Aniston wins the trophy hands down.
It seems she honestly thought that back in 2004, her husband Brad Pitt and actress Angelina Jolie were "nothing but friends" when shooting the film . It was sheer coincidence that by the end of filming, Pitt was uttering noises about not being happy in marriage. Eventually his wife filed for divorce (Pitt probably couldn't make up his mind, with The Clash's Should I Stay or Should I Go? replaying on his iPod).
Within minutes, Brad was all packed up and snapped by the paparazzi strolling on a beach with Angelina and her son, before posing as a 1960's-style married couple in a fashion spread in W magazine. All Jennifer could utter then was: "The world was shocked and I was shocked."
But it still didn't click. Pitt said he had always been faithful and it seems Aniston chose to believe that they just happened to bump each other on that beach.... which was in Africa by the way. Well now, three years on, she has heard it straight from the horse's mouth. Earlier this month, Jolie told The New York Times that she couldn't wait for her kids to be old enough to watch Mr and Mrs Smith, "because not a lot of people get to see a movie where their parents fell in love."
You could almost feel Jennifer's eyes pop out as she read the piece over breakfast. And with what sounds like words spoken with a gulp, she said: "There was stuff printed there that was definitely from a time when I was unaware that it was happening. I felt those details were a little inappropriate to discuss. That stuff about how she couldn't wait to get to work every day? That was really uncool."
A poor simpering reply indeed, which had US and UK columnists in throes over why she doesn't just show her teeth and give Jolie a well-deserved thwack to shut her up once and for all. Because as things stand, Angelina (who is clearly not a girls' girl) will keep on playing the playground vixen, blowing raspberries and chanting 'I got your man, na na na!' And here it has to be pointed out that we can't really blame Angelina, because Brad's spin of 'Oh-our-marriage-has-long-been-over, it's-just-the-mere-technicality-of-moving-out-that-I-still-have-to-sort' must have been really convincing.
So why didn't Jennifer wear a 'You're welcome to the Liar Mrs Smith' t-shirt (I'm being mild here in my suggestions for your sake, gentle readers), instead of blubbering and highlighting how naïve she is? Because she can't - she's still in love with Brad. She said back in 2005 that she loves Pitt and "will love him for the rest of my life". And yep, two years on she still loves him. She doesn't want to be rude because, God forbid, she doesn't want Pitt to think of her as a former fish-wife. She still feels she has to live up to his expectations. She is chained to her love for him. And because he never plucked up the courage to say: 'Look hun, I don't love you anymore, I love this other woman', deep down in her unconscious she is still hoping to win his approval.
Well, Earth calling Jen! Hopefully Angelina's latest outburst will burst her bubble in a way that his mini-football team of kids with Jolie has not.
What a classic example of reality blinded by love. Haven't we all been through it at least once in our lives? But what a consolation to know that it doesn't just happen to us plain, poor and generally unknowns; it also happens to the beautiful, rich, clever and successful.
It's one of those standard scripts of life. With three main protagonists: 'The Naïve Wife', 'The Other Woman' and 'The Liar'. You know what would make a refreshing change in plot? If we all said 'yah boo shucks' to the Brad Pitts of the world. Now hands up those who would?